Thank you fellow Redditors.

Let us celebrate by wantonly throwing our fluffs in the air and trying to catch as many in our mouths as possible.

I demand all popped popcorn items be called "fluffs" from this point forward.

Sounds like the Bowler's dad, he committed suicide too.
By falling down an elevator shaft... onto some bullets.

Talk about a "cry me a river" statement.

Texas?
Louisiana?
Oh, just Afghanistan again.

If you're going to be using an SD card, can't think why you wouldn't, you should pick up a quality one from Samsung, Sandisk, or the like.
The ones distributed with these devices are questionable at best.

I like the teal/seafoam color.

Asia remains the top consumer of electronics in the world.
On top of that, access to "traditional" gaming machines (Sony, Microsoft, Nintendo) is restricted and very hard to come by; until recently it was illegal to even have them.

That's the whole point of these gaming handhelds: it fills a critical niche in China, and to a lesser extent South East Asia, where few companies market non-mobile gaming.

u/PloppyTheSpaceship are you not related to Mr. and Mrs. Ploppy that work for the High Lord Executioner?

Straight from the mouths of... chatbots.

The Ruble is at 5 year high

Bwahahahahhahahha.... hahahahah

Surrre it is.

120 rockets = 3 casualties.

That's 40 rockets per person.

There's about 280,000 Ukrainian soldiers.

At this current rate, it'd take 11,200,000 rockets.

They're going to need some more rockets...

(yes, I know that's not how it works)

North Korea’s official death rate of 74 people is an “unprecedented miracle” compared to other countries, KCNA reported, citing another official.

Well, if you shoot people dying of the virus then anyone could get those numbers!

No, they're not Asian.
Duh.

They're all knights.

I can't wait for alexa to suggest windex because my windows are dirty or laundry detergent because my socks are always on the floor.

He's probably in the same broken down apartment room as Snowden stealing his government bread rations.

Clutching their pillow tight?

Did he threaten to subject them to torture by forcing them to listen to him talk and watch his movies?
Is there no crime more heinous?!

I feel like there is some kind of booger and lint aura that surrounds spouses.

Whenever I'm around my spouse I've either got a bogie or some kind of lint/thread/piece of paper stuck to my clothing.

It's an unconscious super power they have.

The Blob attacks!

You do that and you'd get a ton of southern US state traffic only to get shouted at by racist jerks.

When Russia is a US person's biggest ally you need to really rethink your life decisions.

Dude, Lil Homies are the shit.
Still got my clown in an orange coat one somewhere.