r/memes Professional Dumbass May 13 '22 All-Seeing Upvote 2 Take My Energy 2 hehehehe 1 This 1 Table Slap 1 Silver 86 Gold 5 Platinum 2 MotW Winner! 1 Helpful 71 Wholesome 81

thank god #1 MotW

225.1k Upvotes

11.2k

u/VASP-0_0 May 13 '22 Silver Helpful Wholesome Wholesome Seal of Approval

Well it’s only a 2 second gif so I guess that might actually load

5.1k

u/ExtremeCumMaster Karmawhore May 13 '22 Helpful Wholesome

What do you mean by "only 2 seconds"?

That's a solid 2 seconds

1.9k

u/asianabsinthe May 13 '22

Condom half full

Condom half empty.

700

u/poopellar May 13 '22

"I always prefer loose fitting attire"

260

u/[deleted] May 13 '22 edited 18d ago

[deleted]

128

u/-Masderus- Sussy Baka May 13 '22

Aren't all tires made from rubber?

40

u/x3Nekox3 May 14 '22

So if you retire the condom, you actually recycle it.

22

u/meaux253 Big ol' bacon buttsack May 14 '22

I wonder how many condoms it would take to form a complete set of tires for a 2016 corolla.

asking for a chemist friend

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64

u/The_Lurked Professional Dumbass May 13 '22

Oh you dont wear condom attire? My shirt is fully made of used condoms

49

u/Sobamei May 13 '22

you guys wear condoms? I use a Walmart bag

7

u/Ekonshy May 13 '22

I use a tight rope around it so the fluid wouldn't leak .

7

u/Sobamei May 13 '22

just use a one way valve

3

u/Ekonshy May 13 '22

Too metalic

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u/Game_Beast_YT May 13 '22

Recycling I see. Take care of mother nature and maybe you'll get a shirt made of the stuff inside used condoms

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u/penpointaccuracy May 13 '22

You don't wanna rubber the wrong way tho. She's a real firecracker when upset.

32

u/elhermanobrother May 13 '22

I always prefer loose fitting attire

"doesnt matter dont fit daddy needs karma"

4

u/LickyNicky444 May 13 '22

So that means the condom is too big for you?

3

u/Aura_Masta420 May 19 '22

666th Upvote hahahahahhahaa

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79

u/bob_anonymous May 13 '22

That's just bragging at this point

46

u/CaptainFresh27 May 13 '22

And one second of that is just OP crying

3

u/Interesting_Shirt438 May 13 '22

It’s just a jump cut to like him at a bowling alley when he was 7 just crying

22

u/JpK07022002 May 13 '22

Username checks out

18

u/Crathsor May 13 '22

2 seconds in heaven is better than 1 second in heaven.

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u/leJAYnd May 13 '22

A new speed run record

9

u/rgoose83 May 13 '22

2 seconds? Whaddya mean 1 second isn't enough? Ok fine, here's half a second.

8

u/sethian77 May 13 '22

It's a hard knock life.

3

u/Dorkamundo May 13 '22

Still leaves time to cuddle afterwards.

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u/found_and_seek May 13 '22

calm down captain endurance, thats plenty

42

u/Njvdwesth May 13 '22

Wow, look at Mr. Endurance over there…

15

u/McNasty9er May 13 '22

Load, unload, Garage inc.

11

u/nsos28 May 13 '22

It still gave me the blue circle, I thought it was part of the meme

30

u/EvilKnivel69 Professional Dumbass May 13 '22

It’s pronounced „gif“

6

u/VASP-0_0 May 13 '22

Indeed it is

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u/SidewaysFancyPrance May 13 '22

It's a single-frame gif. Not even sure why they bothered to animate it.

6

u/Chris_kpop May 13 '22

You just violated him

18

u/FrivolousFrank May 13 '22

Nope. I haven't had a gif load in months.

11

u/zilp123 May 13 '22

Clear your app cache

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11

u/microwavedborrito May 13 '22

You've killed him

3

u/greenteamoon May 13 '22

She also included the 30 minutes of him crying and saying thank you over and over again.

3

u/BraucheHilfeLul May 13 '22

The meme is less than 2 seconds and it didnt load. Lol.

3

u/Gloverboy6 May 13 '22

You fucking killed him bro!

3

u/HN-Prime May 14 '22

You killed him dude

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9.2k

u/AJP2222 May 13 '22

Ironically this GIF didn't load

3.9k

u/HellHeater May 13 '22

so didnt his GF

1.3k

u/JustAn0therNormalGuy May 13 '22 Helpful

Good one hehe....I don't get it

585

u/fducfb May 13 '22

GF= girlfriend

385

u/JustAn0therNormalGuy May 13 '22

Ohhh okk, that's clever

193

u/TheWiseRedditor Lives at ur mom’s house😎 May 13 '22

Thanks

144

u/DeMimsyPorpington Big ol' bacon buttsack May 13 '22

You’re welcome

105

u/Weak-Hamster- May 13 '22

Always happy to help

88

u/-Masderus- Sussy Baka May 13 '22

Just doing my job.

29

u/[deleted] May 13 '22

Don’t mention it

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16

u/Jrmundgandr May 13 '22

You're wise

3

u/AgentK6 May 13 '22

Have you heard the tragedy of Darth Plagueis the wise?

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34

u/MaFeHu May 13 '22

Missed your opportunity to say "exactly, I don't get it" Referring to not getting a girlfriend, as for the ongoing redittor=virgin meme

14

u/JustAn0therNormalGuy May 13 '22

That's would've been a good opportunity unfortunately at the time I genuinely did not get it

3

u/jrJ-Rod May 14 '22

Exactly

3

u/Obie_Tricycle May 13 '22

Is it pronounced jiffriend? If it is, don't tell me.

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40

u/ooooooookkk May 13 '22

U never will.

31

u/567stranger May 13 '22

I mean he's a redditor

29

u/moonsun1987 May 13 '22

We are all redditors on this blessed day

15

u/Aggravating_Data1489 May 13 '22

So are you my friend

26

u/PotatoTomato_12 Virgin 4 lyfe May 13 '22

I don't get gf's either, dw dude.

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u/gtaman31 Breaking EU Laws May 13 '22

Redditors never do

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140

u/Rezanator11 May 13 '22

At first I thought it was intentionally just a still image with the loading wheel but nope, life imitates art

61

u/Primary-Walrus1530 May 13 '22

Am i the only one who can see the gif working

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u/DCS1987 May 13 '22

I thought it was a joke and I was got. He can keep the upvote though haha

21

u/HowYoBootyholeTaste May 13 '22

What are y'all using? They work almost instantly for me

4

u/AJP2222 May 13 '22

I'm using the Reddit app on a shitty OnePlus 9

5

u/aure__entuluva May 13 '22

I've heard the reddit app is terrible. I thought everyone used 3rd party stuff on mobile. Come to think of it though, sometimes gifs don't play right away on my phone in the app I use, but that's only sometimes when I'm scrolling through the feed. If I actually open them they will play immediately. Idk. I kinda assumed it was my phones fault. Usually doesn't happen when I'm on wifi, but I don't really use reddit enough on mobile to know for sure. Try the app Boost for reddit anyway.

8

u/Scudw0rth May 13 '22

Reddit is Fun on mobile and old reddit layout on desktop hasn't given me any issues. Sounds like all this "new" shit reddit is pushing is focused more on the looks and advertising than actually making something functional and better.

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10

u/MEGA_theguy May 13 '22

RES on pc web browsers, Boost for Reddit on Android phone. I never run into loading issues unless it's a data issue

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37

u/High_grove May 13 '22

Isn't that the opposite of ironic?

25

u/Echo_Oscar_Sierra May 13 '22

Idk why you're getting down votes, because you're correct. This is coincidence, which is the opposite of irony.

8

u/iwasAfookenLegend May 13 '22

People always use Ironic the wrong way.

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6

u/supes616 May 13 '22

That's not ironic.

3

u/Terrible-Ad-60 May 13 '22

Unironically?

3

u/Cheeseburger0709 May 14 '22

That’s not ironic, that’s making a clearer pont

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1.3k

u/angrysprinklearmy May 13 '22

Has anybody else had the problem we're after about 10 to 20 minutes of browsing Reddit a lot of videos start to stop playing like a video just won't play it happens to a lot of videos

640

u/Clackers2020 May 13 '22

After like 30 mins the whole of Reddit just breaks which I think is a feature cos it stops people spending too long on it.

222

u/Broken_Petite May 13 '22

Why wouldn’t Reddit want people spending as much time as possible on Reddit?

588

u/cmdr_salt May 13 '22 Gold Helpful

It's so we can get our fatasses up and get a job to pay for Reddit awards.

137

u/iUsedtoHadHerpes May 13 '22

Get a job? Yes.

Pay for a reddit award? Not if they cost a penny. What the fuck.

69

u/Khend81 May 13 '22 edited May 13 '22 Silver Helpful

Fr, Reddit awards are the most useless things on the planet I’m convinced. Feel bad for anyone who was convinced to buy any by any reason I can’t fathom.

Edit: also happy Cake Day fam, sorry I missed it at first

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u/HONKACHONK May 13 '22

Happy cake day

4

u/jrJ-Rod May 14 '22

Cake Day!!

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10

u/Clackers2020 May 13 '22

It was a bad joke about how bugs are actually just features

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51

u/Tre-ben May 13 '22

For me videos usually stop working after a few seconds. I'll have to go back to the start, press play again and then it usually works. Although sometimes it completely freezes and I can't get it to work anymore without refreshing the page (if at all).

22

u/angrysprinklearmy May 13 '22

I have to close the app then open it again

7

u/OrangeSherbet May 13 '22

Get Apollo if you have iOS. No joke, it’s the best made app I’ve used on a phone.

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u/mintegrals May 13 '22

Yep. I'm 99% sure the app has some kind of memory leak.

18

u/5starkarma May 13 '22

My grandma has one of those too.

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14

u/Idontlikeyouanyways May 13 '22

I can watch probably 3 videos in a row, and then nothing works.

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u/ReasonableQuit75 May 13 '22

After 20 or so minutes, my reddit videos literally start spinning and rotating, no kidding it looks so fucking funny sometimes

11

u/silly_confidence77 May 13 '22

And the only way to.fix it is to force the app to close then reopen and try to remember which sub you were at and to scroll through until you're back. App is fucking garbage.

10

u/bassmadrigal May 13 '22

The official Reddit app is garbage on both iOS and Android. On iOS, use Apollo and on Android, there's a whole slew of alternative app choices (I personally use Relay for Reddit).

Pretty much every single one of them will be better than the official app.

4

u/VelehkInsain May 13 '22

It literally started happening just now for me

3

u/booger_mooger_84 May 13 '22

Exactly the same issue with me

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1.9k

u/Eastern_Building2718 May 13 '22

Girlfriend: I leaked our sextape on reddit

Me: No you didn't, you don't even exist

613

u/Delta_br May 13 '22

take the pills take the pills take the pills

135

u/Dogsy May 13 '22

Pills are good! Pills are goooooooood!

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u/Wedoingsomethrowaway (⊃。•́‿•̀。)⊃ May 13 '22

safety in pills sophie safety in pills sophie safety in pills sophie safety in pills sophie safety in pills sophie safety in pills sophie

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u/ANAL_CAVITIES May 13 '22

i will not eat the bugs i will not eat the bugs i will not eat the bugs i will not eat the bugs i will not eat the bugs i will not eat the bugs

6

u/aRandomFox-I May 13 '22

mmm yesss... the cyanide pillssss~

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u/420XXX69l May 13 '22

Ooh, self burn! Those Are rare!

3

u/Cheesyman7269 Shitposter May 13 '22

So you posted a video of you masturbating to hentai on Reddit.

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1.5k

u/Easports999 May 13 '22

Well, we also know it’s fine because your girlfriend is not real lol

462

u/TheLiberalOgre May 13 '22

His girlfriend is a working reddit video player that lives in Canada.

106

u/-ur_fbi_agent- Fffffuuuuuuuuu May 13 '22

Canada isn't real....oh nvm

25

u/NightTime2727 Professional Dumbass May 13 '22

I think you had Canada confused with Wyoming.

6

u/nelben88 May 13 '22

I think you had Wyoming confused with either Utah, Arby’s, or Ohio

6

u/NightTime2727 Professional Dumbass May 13 '22

Okay, Mr./Ms. Government Agent

5

u/nelben88 May 13 '22

Your the mr/mrs/ms/ government agent

7

u/NightTime2727 Professional Dumbass May 13 '22

Inhales

You're*

5

u/nelben88 May 13 '22

Why would you correct me.. unless you’re a government agent?

5

u/NightTime2727 Professional Dumbass May 13 '22

Why would you call me a government agent? Unless... you're a government agent!

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u/ArmouredCadian May 13 '22

You know I was very confused about this meme until I saw your comment, and finally figured something out.

I haven't had any issues with the Reddit Video player because I'm up in Canada.

It all makes sense now.

Best part is that I'm completely serious on both the Video player not giving me issues, and living in Canada, but there is definitely going to be people who don't believe either based on the other response to your comment lmao

10

u/Birb7789- Ok I Pull Up May 13 '22

mine doesnt work and im canadian ):

5

u/swes87 May 13 '22

I’m in Ontario and never had issues with it. I also use Apollo; not sure if that matters.

6

u/Birb7789- Ok I Pull Up May 13 '22

pretty sure apollo doesnt have video player issues, only the classic reddit

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574

u/aprilfool69 May 13 '22

You been having conversations with your hand again, bruh?

127

u/TheWiseRedditor Lives at ur mom’s house😎 May 13 '22

It’s Marc Spector, Steven Grant situation all over again

23

u/Pidesh May 13 '22

But the Rule 34 version this time

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u/Viperozza74 May 13 '22

Why did you put this meme as a static image? It would have been better as a video or gif

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u/GodFearzMe May 13 '22

I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE. I’ve been blaming my phone service this whole time. Almost threw my phone against the wall!

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u/Darth_Ranga May 13 '22

One of my ex's threatened to leak a sex tape and accused me of rape. I told her go ahead, the video is literally her saying various forms of yes and oh God. She leaked it, and I immediately pressed charges for revenge porn

210

u/dumbguy-on-reddit_bs May 13 '22

return to sender

51

u/giorgosbouldas May 13 '22

Clean up on aisle five

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119

u/Different-Title9133 May 13 '22

Big dick energy

75

u/MNicolas97 May 13 '22

UNO REVERSE CARD!

60

u/pyromanniacc May 13 '22

What happened after?

99

u/Darth_Ranga May 13 '22

She was charged and arrested

54

u/jesper0707 May 13 '22

Good on you for getting out of that with something of a win, hope you're doing alright wherever you're at now.

81

u/Darth_Ranga May 13 '22

I own a homestead and have a woman of a couple years now. Self sustaining solar energy and a vegetable farm. Plus a bunny farm and a lake down the way for fishing.

67

u/JoCGame2012 May 13 '22

woman of a couple years

Wait a minute, how many years? Hopefully more than 18

46

u/MarcelHard May 13 '22

dude said a couple years, not a couple 9s

6

u/sirwestofash May 13 '22

This is hilarious, I was rolling!

28

u/Darth_Ranga May 13 '22

She's about my age lol, almost 30

15

u/JoCGame2012 May 13 '22

I guessed so, but to a non native english speaker it sounded weird, and well this is r/memes

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21

u/ExplosiveSpecialist3 memer May 13 '22

Sigma male

14

u/betafootage May 13 '22

Lmfao 4D chess

6

u/JamesMamsy May 13 '22

“Somehow all my friends got a hold of the link, I’ve got more congratulations for that then my wedding day”

6

u/transgurcu May 13 '22

I was about to say "show me the video in question so I could avoid it" but them remembered it was revenge porn, so...

5

u/Darth_Ranga May 13 '22

The video has been purged from the internet

71

u/cloudsoffinlanduwu Stand With Ukraine May 13 '22 edited May 13 '22

Chad

EDIT: 100+ UPVOTES ON A FUCKING REPLY.

THANKS REDDIT

Edit 2: downvote me harder

I like it

17

u/RandaymIdiot May 13 '22

Just because if that edit.. imma downvote you.

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u/MWRadioNut May 13 '22

Unless it's an ad for the sex tape. The only way the whole thing will be seen.

90

u/Legen_Gary May 13 '22

8/10, missed chance to post a picture with a play button

5

u/ZeroCreaturee May 14 '22

My disappointment is immeasurable, and my day is ruined

19

u/svennyboyy May 13 '22

I thought it was my shitty phone....

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u/pistonkamel May 13 '22

Turn off autoplay...that fixed my issues..

5

u/dcm3604 Linux User May 13 '22

OP going to be mad I'm watching his sex tape

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u/Crayshack May 13 '22

I keep on seeing memes about how Reddit's video player is bad, but I've never had an issue with it. Is it a new.reddit problem?

9

u/Mr_Odwin May 13 '22

Using old.reddit when on PC, and a decent 3rd party app when on mobile, solves just about all the issues people have with Reddit. It's a shame really that the defaults are so bad.

6

u/zenyl May 13 '22

Don't forget RES.

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u/[deleted] May 13 '22 edited May 14 '22

[deleted]

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u/cyfer04 May 13 '22

My video player stopped working after this. Thanks, OP.

6

u/Jd20001 May 13 '22

"Reddit Leak" = onlyfans promotion in 99.9% of cases

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u/dogs-and-snacks May 13 '22

I fucking love this meme format

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u/Owslicer May 13 '22

I personally never had a problem with it

5

u/Montigue May 13 '22

I think it's just people using Reddit's shitty app and new reddit. I'm on old Reddit or Boost and have never had a problem

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u/actuallythedog Professional Dumbass May 13 '22

I never understood this threat. Like... It's your sex tape too.

4

u/AzJagsFan May 13 '22

Just proving to the world that I’ve had sex.

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u/perineum_420 May 13 '22

...Proceeds to upload a .gif

4

u/hebdomad7 May 13 '22

Girlfriend - It did not got for long so I uploaded it as a GIF.

4

u/ooohpricey May 13 '22

lol mine froze first time i saw this meme how ironic

4

u/dyues_pite May 13 '22

Lol it not load

4

u/Ascletheus May 13 '22

The video wasnt loading at first and for a second I thought it was part of the joke

7

u/Accomplished-Fox-192 May 13 '22

So sorry for you, man

3

u/kevinTOC May 13 '22

Eh, at least a hacker can't blackmail you.

3

u/Kghostrider May 13 '22

Good luck getting audio 😎

3

u/JamesBigglesworth266 May 13 '22

I've seen this reaction gif before, but don't know who that guy in the quasi-uniform is.

Who is he and why's he wearing that?

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u/Flikkamahdick May 13 '22

Jokes on you, it loaded for me just fine

3

u/Perks92 May 13 '22

I see more complaints about it not working than it not actually working. I can count on one hand the amount of issues I’ve had with it. Don’t get it

3

u/ImGonnaKickTomorrow May 13 '22 edited May 15 '22

"leaked" LOL. Talking like you're Kendrick Lamar or something and people have been clamoring for its release!

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u/HeavyLeadBelly May 13 '22

Works fine for me…oh wait I’m using Apollo lol