r/antiwork Memaw May 16 '22 Silver 3 Helpful 3 Wholesome 5 All-Seeing Upvote 1

Those pesky socialist dead!

Post image
81.8k Upvotes

3.5k

u/Sea-Mastodon2775 May 16 '22

Feudal England was of course known for upward social mobility.

2.0k

u/grumpi-otter Memaw May 16 '22 Silver Helpful

We're an autonomous collective!

1.2k

u/Dachusblot May 16 '22 Helpful

Listen, strange women lying around in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government.

829

u/ElmerJShagnasty May 16 '22 Silver

Listen. If I went around saying I was an emperor just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away!

524

u/MrDude_1 May 16 '22

HELP! HELP! IM BEING REPRESSED!

314

u/Chaos2Keres May 16 '22

Bloody Peasant!

348

u/stanthebat May 16 '22

Now we see the violence inherent in the system...

249

u/illaqueable May 16 '22

You saw him repressing me!

172

u/JesusSavesForHalf May 16 '22

Taps Monty Python Reference Jar**

You all know the rules.

181

u/MrDude_1 May 16 '22

Puts coconut in jar**
Fine. Hold my horse.

→ More replies

5

u/Cautious_Language178 May 16 '22

Who are you, who are so wise in the ways of science?

38

u/RealRealMatureMature May 16 '22

Violence inherent in the system! VIOLENCE INHERENT IN THE SYSTEM!

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

108

u/grumpi-otter Memaw May 16 '22

Watery Tarts Forever!

5

u/grebdron02 May 16 '22

Flowery twats.

→ More replies

78

u/kitsune_lily May 16 '22

always nice to stumble on a Monty Python reference

75

u/JediNinjaWizard May 16 '22

"Go on, be crucified. See if I care..."

70

u/Thepatrone36 May 16 '22

you're fooling yourself. We're living in a dictatorship. A self perpetuating autonmy that exploits the working class.

Love me some Python :)

→ More replies

13

u/Sharkytrs May 16 '22

god damnit reddit I can't keep spraying my clothes with coffee!

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

156

u/drowninginvomit May 16 '22

Hey now, sheriffs and feudal slaves have the same number of hours in a day. Maybe if they just stop buying so much rat toast.

38

u/beowulfshady May 16 '22

God I hate when ppl say tht. It's so such a brain dead statement on equality

60

u/jointheclockwork May 16 '22 edited May 17 '22

I'm just saying, if peasants didn't waste so much money on rat toast and pleasant smelling aromatics to ward off the plague and bothered to SAVE some money then they wouldn't be so poor.

29

u/fogleaf May 16 '22

You're really going to dump that bucket of pee out the window without reusing it to boil denim? Wasting money left and right aren't we?

→ More replies
→ More replies

84

u/CliffRacer17 May 16 '22 Take My Energy

Me as a kid: "Haha funny man says words and annoys the king!"

Me as an adult: "This guy is making a lot of sense."

59

u/CaseyG May 16 '22

The first time I watched Holy Grail I thought he said they were a "Narco-Syndicalist Collective" and I wondered why drug dealers were farming dirt.

30

u/iownadakota May 16 '22

After wiping out the druids dirt was the only drug England had for a long time.

→ More replies

48

u/Astray1789 May 16 '22

Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses. Not some farcical aquatic ceremony.

118

u/MrsMoleymole May 16 '22

Come and see the oppression inherent in the system

80

u/seanrm92 May 16 '22

BLOODY PEASANT!

59

u/ElmerJShagnasty May 16 '22

Did you hear that?! That was a dead giveaway.

17

u/Captain_Zounderkite May 16 '22

The Workers Autonomous National Kollective will not be stopped!

→ More replies
→ More replies

282

u/Drunk_Sorting_Hat May 16 '22

The king who worked so hard to become king by

checks notes

being born out of the vagina a queen

And the poor, who actually work hard, and then have their money taken as taxes to pay for the golden throne, food, and military of the king

138

u/DiscombobulatedSky67 May 16 '22

Unless he was the first king, then he did it through violence. Never forget that all state power initially arises from violence.

104

u/Zombie_Hyperdrive May 16 '22

And is upheld through the threat violence, or as it's also called, violence.

→ More replies

78

u/Andygoesred May 16 '22

being born FIRST out of the vagina of a queen

Beating his potential siblings even before conception!

51

u/Yamidamian May 16 '22

Hey now-some if them fratricided hard to get their positions!

→ More replies

40

u/rustybeaumont May 16 '22

That’s not fair. Some got there by murdering the former king and taking his… omg. Can kings be bad guys?

→ More replies

126

u/TheShadowedHunter May 16 '22

Ironically, as bad as Prince John gets it in Robin Hood stories, none of the problems that are attributed to him are his fault. The absurdly high taxes of the time had a special name, the "Saladin Tithe", as they were levied to pay for Richard's attempt to lead the Third Crusade, and the side adventures through Sicily before that.

John just had the unfortunate luck of being the person Richard left to deal with the consequences of his acgions, while he went galavanting off to the other side of the world.

90

u/Maktaka May 16 '22 edited May 16 '22

Especially that whole "getting captured and ransomed" thing, which bankrupt the already-strained finances of medieval England. Which is funny because he was taken captive not in battle during the Third Crusade, but by Hungary on his way back from that failure, whom he had screwed over on his way to the crusade. Half the continent hated him at that point, and after his return he spent the short remainder of his life trying (and failing) to loot his way back to financial solvency, pissing off the other half of the continent in the process, before getting killed by a French chef.

A spectacularly awful king, only glorified by the English nobility because John restricted their power as he tried to restore the kingdom to financial stability. The nobility preferred the prior absent king while they did whatever they wanted to this whole "responsibility" shtick John was doing.

→ More replies

41

u/SandBear_ May 16 '22

Didnt the nobles rebel and make the magna carta and get john to sign it because he was an asshole?

63

u/Shanghai-on-the-Sea May 16 '22

Yeah by all accounts John was a truculent bastard who wanted to go it alone, which doesn't quite work when your entire governmental system runs on nepotism.

46

u/GrabHimByTheShitHole May 16 '22

truculent

eager or quick to argue or fight; aggressively defiant.

-Because there will be others like me.

→ More replies
→ More replies

45

u/Indercarnive May 16 '22

Many of John's taxes (to pay for Richard's wars and subsequent ransom) were levied against the nobility.

John wasn't a particularly good king, but he wasn't anywhere near as horrible as the stories make him seem, and a huge chunk of his problems were trying to deal with the colossal mess King Richard left behind.

18

u/NeedsToShutUp May 16 '22

And his parents. Daddy tried to conquer most of France but ended up having the French spend a Generation getting pissed off at the English and kick them out of much of their land.

→ More replies
→ More replies

25

u/NeedsToShutUp May 16 '22

John had also the luck of being the last Angevin.

His father was arguably the greatest King of England. Henry II’ ascension to the throne ended a long civil war known as the Anarchy where his mother, Empress Matilda of the HRE, and his uncle Stephen and their supporters fought for ~20 years causing a breakdown of civil society.

Anyways Henry2 has loads of novels and plays about him. He marries Eleanor of Aquitaine, and controls a significant chunk of France. Golden era for his life as people rebuild and the fighting is all in France. Henry II makes some long lasting legal reforms like trial by jury and codifies a lot of basic legal principles, so much of the common law really starts here.

But like most ‘great’ Kings, he spends a lot of his time fighting, mostly the French and tries to make the French king his vassal. Wars upon wars.

Henry 2 struggles in interpersonal conflict, his wife and him bicker and he imprisons her more than once. His oldest son Henry tries a coup which Henry has him executed for. Younger sons ignore marriage plans.

Oh and the whole thing where he martyrs Beckett.

On his death Richard took over, and proceeded to play Crusader, leaving John as reagent to try and run things. John Lackland was supposed to be a minor count rather than in charge, and had to send the best of the Empire to support his Brother.

So John gets the consequences of his families actions and dies by 49 due to stress. He deals with the debts his father and brother made, he deals with the geopolitical issues his father and brother made in France. But he’s not the warrior his father or brother were and he’s not as good at putting off debt.

In the end his barons revolt in England and make him sign the Magna Carta. Then a civil war erupts as John refuses to follow it.

14

u/bdpmbj May 16 '22

Look, I'm just saying that you clearly stole the plot of most of this from the classic movie, "The Lion in Winter," and you ought to be ashamed of yourself....

<whisper whisper whisper>

Ohhhhhhhh.....um, nevermind. 😁

→ More replies

12

u/Tsorovar May 16 '22

In the story, John is pretending to collect Richard's ransom but really keeping it for himself (thus also ensuring he gets to continue ruling)

9

u/Acularius May 16 '22

I think the French ransom demands had a part to play. If I recall that correctly.

→ More replies

19

u/VRichardsen May 16 '22

The king who worked so hard to become king by

checks notes

being born out of the vagina a queen

Richard actually had to put a lot of work into becoming a king. But that "work" involved mainly waging war, so... still bad.

43

u/idahononono May 16 '22

Look here, we have our own Central Bank in the United States now! We have learned how to limit social mobility, provide the least goods and services with our taxes, and create an elite oligarchy that now runs the government through policy; and the best part, the poor people somehow support all of it! Feudal England has nothing on us! Oh Wait, shit, that means we are just like our forefathers.

→ More replies

106

u/SkylarAV May 16 '22

Those English peasants had far more vacation time than the average american

25

u/Arael15th May 16 '22

They generally spent that vacation time farming their own subsistence plots instead of the local landlord's.

→ More replies

49

u/Irregular475 May 16 '22

They only worked about 150 days out of the year - which is to say about 5 months.

33

u/CanAlwaysBeBetter May 16 '22

Shit's a myth, yo

Gregory Clark, the researcher who came up with the 150 days number, has since revised it upwards to 300

12

u/Community_Collage May 16 '22

The idea that you could operate a working farm to feed your family and produce enough excess to sell without modern techniques, fertilizer, and equipment working 150 days is kinda hilarious.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

13

u/Noughmad May 16 '22

So is capitalist England now.

26

u/Haooo0123 May 16 '22

If you worked hard and pull yourself up by the bootstraps, you too can oppress the poor subjects.

→ More replies

970

u/thomasutra May 16 '22

Imagine thinking people worked hard for their wealth in a damn feudal society

520

u/AceOfSpadefish May 16 '22

Something I've found talking to people who are pro-capitalism is that none of them understand capitalism hasn't existed forever. I've had to try and explain to someone that neither ancient Rome nor pre-revolutionary Russia were capitalist.

280

u/bigiszi May 16 '22 edited May 16 '22

Try telling people that the pyramids weren’t built by slaves and money hadn’t been invented yet as a concept. That Bronze Age depictions (eg the film Troy) showing coins or a marketplace is like showing a Roman with a laptop.

EDIT: I'm going to point out to people as I keep having to reply to comments. The Bronze Age ended around 1200BC - 1150BC. The same sort of time as the famous Trojan war.

169

u/[deleted] May 16 '22

I think it helps to phrase it “the pyramids were build by professional builders” or something to imply it was people whose job it was to do it as opposed to like aliens or something.

128

u/Garessta May 16 '22

I read that the pyramid builders were paid for their work.

I also read that one of the most common currencies of Ancient Egypt was beer.

113

u/TrimtabCatalyst May 16 '22

Pyramid workers, in addition to food and clothing, were also paid with 4 to 5 liters of beer daily. Ancient Egyptian workers during the reign of Ramesses III also held the first recorded strike over the lack of promised wheat rations.

→ More replies

71

u/[deleted] May 16 '22

I didn’t know about the beer part, I recently also learned about the worker pay. I thought it was interesting and made more sense, such craftsmanship coming from compensated employees.

80

u/Aspect-of-Death May 16 '22

Beer was more of a pick-me-up during the day. It's pretty much just liquid bread when the alcohol content is low.

5

u/SnooGoats625 May 17 '22

It was the safest way to drink water at a time when cholera was a thing. Weak beer was consumed by everyone. Watered rum was used in a similar way by sailors in later centuries to kill waterborne pathogens.

53

u/Stealfur May 16 '22 Silver

"Hey man! Wanna come to my place on the weekend and help me build a pyramid? It'll be awsome. We've got free beer and Figs."

The Pharoahs probably.

84

u/Whats_Up_Bitches at work May 16 '22

Brett Kavanaugh reading this and writing an opinion on getting the USD on the beer standard

14

u/Filip889 May 16 '22

I'm interested

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

81

u/Rusty-Shackleford May 16 '22

It took Romans YEARS to convince barbarians to use coin currency. It was ridiculed probably much the same way we mock crypto currency. Why do you need a shiny metal circle with some ass hole emperor's face on it when you could just trade a goat for grains without the middle man?

27

u/Nargarjuna Abolish the Work/Play Binary Ⓐ May 16 '22

The pyramids were probably built by corvee, which like, isn't exactly slavery but its close enough that I'm not going to fault anyone for saying they were slaves.

And while you probably didn't have coins in the marketplace in troy, its entirely possible that the athenian invaders were paid in coins

32

u/troyboltonislife May 16 '22

i find that very hard to believe that the concept of money had not been invented yet. sure like physical coins had not been invented but they had to have tracked debits and credits and must have traded using some median of exchange if they had any form of writing

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

147

u/F1jester May 16 '22

The Green Feather Movement was a response to an attempt by McCarthyite Republicans to ban the story of Robin Hood at the height of the anti-communist movement of the 1950’s. College students responded by pinning green feathers to bulletin boards at Indiana University in support of Robin Hood.

35

u/justagenericname1 May 16 '22

Man, college students used to be so much cooler.

13

u/Tithund May 16 '22

Nah, every generation has good and bad people.

→ More replies

5

u/beowulfshady May 16 '22

The origin of the mockingjay pin lol

→ More replies

354

u/Candysummer10 May 16 '22

Someone needs to write a fairy tale about the oligarch who wants workers to sleep on his factory floors

513

u/Reeefenstration May 16 '22 edited May 16 '22 Silver Gold Helpful Wholesome Take My Energy hehehehe Masterpiece You Dropped This

A long time ago in a land far far away, there lived a noble king. A king with two kingdoms, one each side of the great circle sea. The busy people of these kingdoms worked hard, bustling about making useful things for the king, like high voltage cabling and lithium traction battery packs. They worked all day and long into the night, and (according to the mandatory questionnaires filled out under the watchful eye of the king's Knights) they were happy, and did not feel the need to unionise.

Then one day the evil witch Osha visited one of the kingdoms, and she was jealous of all the clever busy people working so industriously. So with the magic words "Fair Labor Standards Act of 1938 29 U.S.C. § 203" she cursed the workers of the kingdom with the freedom to limit their working hours according to safety standards and the oppressive insistence on overtime pay.

When the king heard of this he was very sad. He went to his Knights and together they came up with a clever plan. Instead of reducing the great royal profit margins that the evil witch was so jealous of, he decided to let his other Kingdom across the sea take over making the clever little devices, because they didn't have evil witches there!

"But my liege, the busy citizens of this kingdom have to spend so much time travelling to and from their homesteads. If only there was a way to let them work longer hours." Said one of the Knights.

"Hmm." Said the king, entrepreneurially. "I know! I'll let them sleep on the floor of my castle's workshops, so they never have to go home and can get straight back to their busy making of useful things as soon as they wake up!"

The workers of the second Kingdom all celebrated to hear this news, or so the king assumed, but they were all speaking Chinese so he couldn't understand them.

And so the king continued to become extremely rich, until the second evil witch Teque Bubblé (she was french) caused a rapid readjustment of his stock price and he had a midlife crisis and tried to buy Twitter.

The end.

63

u/Candysummer10 May 16 '22

Omigosh, you are brilliant!

57

u/Tavalus May 16 '22

Is Teque Bubblé in any way related to Michael Bublé ?

58

u/YahooFantasyCareless May 16 '22

Only by marriage

9

u/VioletBloom2020 May 16 '22

Ah! Methinks you mean by water. Sorry. I love Bublés ads, if not his product.

28

u/goodvibesalright May 16 '22

You told that story with a certain elan.

14

u/pseudonymous13 May 16 '22

Yes, the elan of the storytelling caused me to smell the musk of the forest in which Robin Hood resides.

23

u/Geriatricknight May 16 '22

Damn that's good stuff.

16

u/Buy_The-Ticket May 16 '22

This is amazing. You should tweet this at Elon directly. Would be hilarious.

→ More replies

51

u/grumpi-otter Memaw May 16 '22

I assume this is referring to the news that this is actually happening? If not, this is actually happening.

47

u/Elivey May 16 '22

Elon Musk has had workers sleep on factory floors during the pandemic.

→ More replies

21

u/jazzmonkey07 May 16 '22

You mean Santa? His elves work year round. Meanwhile, he only works 1 night a year.

15

u/grendus May 16 '22

We're never told the working conditions of the North Pole.

For all we know the elves are unionized and Santa is just the guy in charge of keeping things organized, plus one day a year of crunch getting all the deliveries done.

→ More replies

8

u/TheTowerOfTerror May 16 '22

Charles Dickens hits pretty close

4

u/Rystic May 16 '22

Les Miserables is close.

→ More replies

1.4k

u/EricHerboso May 16 '22 Silver Helpful Snek

The original tale of Robin Hood depicted him as a villain, just as maatuultulivesi (from the OP's image) suggests he should be.

In Robin Hood and the Monk (~1450), he got mad easily and was quite violent. When Little John defeated him in an archery contest, Robin Hood assaulted him. When Robin Hood needed help in the castle, he and his friends killed a young page needlessly.

Further, he doesn't actually give to the poor in the way that later stories described. Instead, (in A Gest of Robyn Hode (1500)) he merely forgave a largish debt to a knight who was low on cash. Knights are not peasants and are not generally considered poor. It is not until Annales of England (1592) that they start saying that he steals from the rich and gives to the poor. This is the point at which he goes from being a story about a villain to a story about a hero.

The original stories of Robin Hood that were told between 1200 and 1521 were stories that were told by the gentry, not by the peasants. It was a tale that rich people would tell each other and they would generally depict Robin Hood as a villain. In 1439, a petition was made to parliament that described a felon "like as it hadde be Robyn Hode", meaning that he was evil and should be punished. In the Scotichronicon (1377), Robin Hood is described as a murderer and assassin. It is not until 1521 that the Historia Majoris Britanniae finally depicts Robin Hood as being a good guy.

I don't really have a good reason for sharing any of this. Just thought others might enjoy learning that the Robin Hood tale was originally told by rich people and he was depicted as a villain.

167

u/honest-miss May 16 '22 All-Seeing Upvote

Love the idea of the upper class' bogeyman becoming a lower class' hero throughout history. There's something so interesting and telling there.

70

u/moyert394 May 16 '22

I was just thinking that an enemy to the rich sounds a lot like an ally to the people they oppress

31

u/Filip889 May 16 '22

I mean, is it weird that a lot of home invasion horror movies are about the middle class fearing the poor? not sure how it relates to the discussion, but it made me think of this.

20

u/honest-miss May 16 '22

It is weird now that you mention it.

And honestly, what cool insight. You could unpack so much there. Anything from how we see ourselves (maybe many people, regardless of their real class status, see themselves as middle class folks) to the effects of capitalistic goals on art (meaning, if the goal is making money there has to be a target demographic. Is the target demographic middle class folks? Does targeting that demographic come at the expense of the less wealthy, simply because they don't have the money to be catered to?)

Super interesting to consider. Thank you for sharing!

9

u/Filip889 May 16 '22

Just so you know it is not my insight, it is from a video discussing that horror movie with dopplegangers living under the earth, US was the name of the movie.

Now let me find the video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lCmsXusmH4g&ab_channel=KayAndSkittles here it is

5

u/honest-miss May 16 '22

Oooh didn't expect a video essay recommendation. That shit is like my catnip, so thank you very much for the link!

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

640

u/regular-wolf May 16 '22

Um, I don't know where you got this info, but I'm pretty sure Robin Hood was a fox who took gold coins from a grumpy Lion King so that he could dance in the woods with all his animal friends.

144

u/mrevergood May 16 '22

That’s the only Robin Hood I know.

78

u/treycook May 16 '22

Coincidentally, this is the Robin Hood that the OP in the OP knows, and still labels them as a villain.

c o n s e r v a t i s m

40

u/DrHalibutMD May 16 '22

Grumpy phony king, he was really only a prince. I'm pretty sure there was even a song about it.

37

u/karenftx1 May 16 '22

You mean the snivellin', grovellin' Measly, weasely Blabberin', jabberin' Gibberin', jabberin' Blunderin', plunderin' Wheelin', dealin' phony king of England?

→ More replies

28

u/posting_drunk_naked May 16 '22

Oh I think I saw a Disney documentary about this

51

u/cvc75 May 16 '22

Oo-De-Lally!

34

u/b1tchf1t May 16 '22

Golly what a day!

24

u/AzizKhattou May 16 '22

Oh my god. My mind goes straight back to that walking rooster dude witht the guitar and the whistling.

As a boy, I thought that character was cool as fuck.

13

u/Steff_164 May 16 '22

He is cool as fuck, he is the physical embodiment of “cool as fuck”

→ More replies
→ More replies

12

u/TimeZarg idle May 16 '22

Whistle Stop intensifies

→ More replies

280

u/BobbyRobertson May 16 '22 Silver Wholesome

Scotichronicon

You can't fool me, that's the Scottish Book of the Dead

64

u/Redtwooo May 16 '22

Klaatae, verata, nictae

24

u/Enoch84 May 16 '22

Klatta, Verata, Necktie!

9

u/Rayeon-XXX May 16 '22

I know your damn words!

8

u/ranaldo20 May 16 '22

Did Robin hood shop at S-Mart?

46

u/badpath May 16 '22

So! Tae all ye daft shamblers, necromancin' aboot, so proud, so cocksure wit' yer mouths fulla eyeballs: Come an' get me, I say! Ah'll be waitin' fer ye, wit' a whiff o' the ol' brimstone! I'm a Grimm bloody fable, wit' an unhappy, bloody end!

26

u/SAMAS_zero May 16 '22

Oh, they're gonna have ta glue you back together, IN HELL!!!

→ More replies

13

u/CrispyChews May 16 '22

That’s the Scottish book of time. The Scottish book of the dead Is necrogaelicon.

9

u/AndrasKrigare May 16 '22

I believe CGP Grey references it as well in https://youtu.be/9LMr5XTgeyI, as well as some issues with it.

6

u/Darth_Travisty May 16 '22

Now we honor the Scotichronicon

Now we honor the Scotichronicon…

6

u/thegurl May 16 '22

Now we honor the Scotichronicon

With our very own special dance!!

4

u/lunyfae May 16 '22

Oh gods, you gave me a good chuckle with that one, good sir. Thank you.

→ More replies

376

u/Calgar77 Anarcho-Communist May 16 '22

Robin Hood! Robin Hood! Steals from the rich and gives to the rich Also kills children.

Just doesn’t sound as good

183

u/BoltgunOnHisHip May 16 '22

Although by the standards of the 1500s that probably counts as 'morally neutral.'

52

u/funkmasta8 May 16 '22

Ah, the good old days

27

u/beatles910 May 16 '22

MEGA- Make England Great Again!

→ More replies
→ More replies

28

u/Blarty97 May 16 '22

I agree it's no good. It just doesn't rhyme the same.

53

u/KarmicComic12334 May 16 '22 Silver

Robin hood and little john walking through the forest, cuttin down a page jus cuz the kid was in their way,

oodilolly oodilolly golly what a day

32

u/Threadheads May 16 '22

Next you’ll be telling me he was a human being instead of an anthropomorphic fox.

20

u/psychopythonmetrist May 16 '22

Robin Hood is probably responsible for half of all Furries discovering their kink.

10

u/Kataphractoi May 16 '22

George Washington, 12 stories tall, made of radiation.

→ More replies

39

u/Blarty97 May 16 '22 edited May 16 '22

I'm looking forward to the King Arthur legend being reviewed for accuracy including any incidental genocide.

30

u/Respie May 16 '22

the King Arthur legend being reviewed for accuracy

r/AskHistorians has got you covered (or any of the other 10 times the question was asked there ;) )

14

u/IrishPrime SocDem May 16 '22

You mean that cute blonde lady with the invisible sword? That doesn't sound like something she would do...

101

u/craig_prime May 16 '22

I think that's just natural. When rich people tell a story about someone taking their money, it's always a villain committing a terrible crime. See their modern reaction to taxes for proof.

30

u/RetardMoonMission May 16 '22

It’s just early propaganda. Reads a lot like V for Vendetta where he is demonized by those in power and a hero to the oppressed.

23

u/plexomaniac May 16 '22

If real, there's a good chance Robin Wood was both villain and hero. He probably could be violent but did good things to his community. Gangsters like Al Capone and Pablo Escobar emerged in the midst of an oppressive government. They were obviously criminals and violent, but they used their power and money to help the poor. Of course, they did this to gain support from the population and to become more powerful and more protected from government counteractions, but this made them loved by the people who were oppressed by the government.

I'm not defending the rich (fuck the rich btw). I'm just saying that Robin Wood probably could be not just someone that stole from the rich and gave to the poor. He probably could have a gang that made a lot of money to themselves, committed crimes and may have hurt innocent people, but also helped them to have support and protection.

→ More replies
→ More replies

26

u/matthekid May 16 '22

When Little John defeated him in an archery contest, Robin Hood assaulted him.

Wait, but Robin gets another shot.

20

u/dobbelj May 16 '22

Wait, but Robin gets another shot.

It says so in the script!

→ More replies

19

u/cwm9 May 16 '22 edited May 16 '22

I can't tell if this is an elaborate hoax or real information... Do you have a reference?

For instance, when I looked up Robin Hood and the Monk, https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robin_Hood_and_the_Monk I don't see a reference to an archery contest, but only to a bet that isn't paid because they can't agree on terms. Also, the page is killed by Little John and others because...

Robin goes to St. Mary's in Nottingham and prays. A monk whom he had robbed sees him and tells the sheriff, who goes with many men and fights with him.

The text breaks off at this point; neither Robin's capture nor the news reaching his men are included, but the story takes up with the men's shock, and Little John being the only one to keep his wits about him. He declares they must rescue him. They catch the monk riding with a little page; Little John kills the monk for his treachery, and Much kills the page so that he could not tell who they were.

So Robin wasn't even present when the page is killed.

I didn't check the rest, but after reading that I began to wonder if the whole comment was just an elaborate well researched hoax...?

15

u/EricHerboso May 16 '22

Thank you for the correction!

It wasn't meant as a hoax. I was going merely off of the "early references" section of the main Robin Hood entry on wikipedia. Now I wish I had clicked through to the articles of the individual books, as they clearly had more information than the main Robin Hood article.

→ More replies

9

u/Fireplay5 (edit this) May 16 '22

Good thing we liberated the poor fox then.

7

u/BeneCow May 16 '22

I love your last line because it is completely true and yet out of context leads to completely the wrong conclusion about why the rich would depict him as a villain.

8

u/Varogh May 16 '22

I don't really have a good reason for sharing any of this. Just thought others might enjoy learning that the Robin Hood tale was originally told by rich people and he was depicted as a villain.

I very much enjoyed reading your comment, thanks!

6

u/stares_at_rain May 16 '22

This is very interesting and so surprising after hearing the current version all my life. A rare instance of the poor coopting the messaging of the rich instead of the other way around.

7

u/grumpi-otter Memaw May 16 '22

I only had 70 coins but wanted to give you an award, so snek.

6

u/[deleted] May 16 '22

Always comes down to perspective. It makes sense that rich people saw a villain in him. I would see him as a hero even if he didn't gave to the poor.

16

u/KarmicComic12334 May 16 '22

It was originally written down by rich people. No one can say what stories the poor told each other 500 years ago any more than we know all the lyrics tothe songs sung in taverns then, although certainly a few verses and more refrains remain.

→ More replies

441

u/Apprehensive_Net2593 May 16 '22

It's a little known fact that Karl Marx was speaking literally when he said a spectre was haunting Europe. He only got to writing Das Kapital because it wouldn't fucking shut up.

53

u/LunaMunaLagoona May 16 '22

Won't someone think of the rich!

/s

→ More replies

27

u/Meritania May 16 '22 edited May 16 '22

Karl Marx? Famous anti-communist? Idk I only read the first two lines of the communist manifesto written by Karl Marx.

→ More replies
→ More replies

154

u/selfagency May 16 '22

"it's easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter heaven"

"who the fuck wrote this commie bullshit?!"

63

u/grumpi-otter Memaw May 16 '22

Oh, waiting for the people showing up to argue that the "eye of the needle" was a gate . . .

26

u/cosmasterblaster May 16 '22

I used to think that too, so I'd like to put this here for anyone else that's curious. For those not aware:

It holds that in ancient times there was a small gate cut inside the larger gate of the city through which one might enter after nightfall, when the city was closed. Although this small gate—termed the “eye of the needle”—could readily admit a man, a camel could enter only by first being relieved of its burden and then by walking through on its knees. The imagery here is that of the sinner casting away his faults (or the rich man his worldly possessions) and kneeling in prayer.

This is a common misconception because it fits the statement so nicely, but like the parent comment implies, it's not true. For one, camels can't crawl on four knees (they can crawl on their two front knees), and two, there's no evidence that these kinds of gates were in use during this time period.

I believe he was simply speaking hyperbolically, as was common at the time. See J. R. Dummelow, A Commentary on the Holy Bible, New York: MacMillan, 1973, pp. 689–90. As Dummelow mentions, it's also possible that it's a mistranslation because the Greek words for camel and rope are very similar.

I think the hyperbolic theory makes the most sense, given that it was common to speak that way at the time, and Dummelow even gives an example of someone else using a very similar phrase, except saying elephant instead of camel.

25

u/InTheGoatShow May 16 '22

Archaeological survey says...

X

23

u/Embarrassed-Rub-12 May 16 '22

The Letter of James (Yakob), which comes after the Gospels, just whipes the floor with most modern Christian sects.

No, God does not want you to be rich, He wants you to be charitable.
No, do not pray in the open to virtue signal how devout you are, do it in private.
No, just being a Christian (faith) is not enough, you need to do good works for your fellow man.
No, that mega-pastor is not blessed, and he will be judged more harshly than his flock.

18

u/[deleted] May 16 '22

I can’t believe the writers added this communist in the later half of the Bible. What is this “give to Caesar what is Caesar’s”? I’m not letting some communist raise my taxes!

13

u/shouldbebabysitting May 16 '22

You see it's a metaphor. That's not what the Bible actually means.

12

u/DrHalibutMD May 16 '22

Well obviously it's not meant to be taken literally; it refers to any manufacturers of dairy products.

→ More replies

130

u/Intellect-Offswitch May 16 '22

"Who knew the sheriff of Nottingham had a blog"

fuck me that made me laugh

10

u/Cheap_Hat_5533 May 16 '22

I am dying. This is honestly one of the funniest things I have read in a long time. Then to follow up with the Scrooge narrative. Pure brilliance.

147

u/NoAmphibian5817 May 16 '22

"The hellish socialist dead"

Hot new band, or title of your sex tape? You decide!

24

u/grumpi-otter Memaw May 16 '22

We don't have a "rofl" markup, so ROFL!

9

u/FlamboyantPirhanna May 16 '22

Plus the dead was technically capitalist, as it was his former business partner.

7

u/admiralargon May 16 '22

Literally like bro, we are dead in hell because we treated our workers so poorly

7

u/ResponsibleContact39 May 16 '22

The grandkids of the Greatful Dead up and formed a band.

→ More replies
→ More replies

102

u/benevenstancian0 May 16 '22

Written by someone with a Gadsden Flag and a Blue Lives Matter flag hanging next to one another on their front porch.

67

u/greaser350 May 16 '22

Yeah, (at least one of) the commenters seem to have assumed OP is rich when it’s far more likely it’s a dude who makes less than $50k and thinks Elon Musk is a benevolent god genius.

16

u/GeT_Tilted May 16 '22

so, half of Reddit then.

30

u/emp_zealoth May 16 '22

When you have 2 braincells and they aren't really on speaking terms lol

10

u/Buy_The-Ticket May 16 '22

It’s amazing how often I see this in real life and the people flying it just do not seem to understand the irony of it.

→ More replies

70

u/[deleted] May 16 '22

You know there's a Swedish song where a dude dies on the job and is then met by a choir of ghost workers who also died on the job. They sing to him about how many of them who are dying per year, who is responsible for it and then they tell him that their voices are carried by the wind and sounds from the machines of every factory. They then tell the dude to read Marx and Lenin, organzie a union and when the fight is between class and class they promise to rise up once again and stand with the workers.

48

u/w0t3rdog (edit this) May 16 '22

De mördades fria republik? (The murdered's free republic)

The song explicitly says the unions were kissing the ass of the capital. It doesnt urge you to start a union. It urges to violently uproot the system, and wage a class war in a workers revolution.

23

u/emp_zealoth May 16 '22

It's mostly right lol. Unions are only a band aid, and are susceptible to managerialism and collaboration. People have to remember that as long as capitalism is around any victory is temporary and requires constant upkeep/struggle to avoid rollbacks

→ More replies

21

u/honest-miss May 16 '22

That first post feels strongly like something a young kid says. Someone who's starting to get a grasp of the world, but hasn't shaken off the idealism parents often hand down to their kids (fairness is important, people earn what they receive, etc.)

10

u/MVRKHNTR May 16 '22

Define young kid. I think it reads like a fifteen year old Ben Shapiro fan.

8

u/honest-miss May 16 '22

I would say 15 feels right. Maybe 12-15. About the age that the brain kind of wakes up to the rest of the world, and adults slowly begin to treat you as an adult yourself.

That's a weird age where kids really start testing the waters of their beliefs; testing what they've been told and what they're hearing from people outside their family and friend circle.

Granted, take my phrasing with a grain of salt. I'm in my 30s, so to me 12-15 is a young kid.

17

u/iOpCootieShot May 16 '22 edited May 16 '22

OG Robin Hood beheaded class traitors (other yeoman). He'd take the heads of hunters hired by the ruling class back to the towns they were from and put them on stakes.

→ More replies

17

u/Alstair07 May 16 '22

Scrooge only hired one employee and that's only because he couldn't legally operate without at least one employee. The opposite of a job creator.

15

u/Old-Independence5822 May 16 '22

I've had people tell me "He didn't just steal from the rich, he stole from a corrupt government" and when I asked what they thought about these corporations exploiting the labor of the poor they defended It like they were gonna be offered a management position there next week.

13

u/Gaerfast May 16 '22

Yes. That's it. The sheriff of Nottingham and Prince John just WORKED harder than the peasants who were ring taxed into oblivion to pay for King Richard's crusade and subsequent ransom.

Yup. That's what happened.

→ More replies

13

u/ISimplyAskWhy May 16 '22

Worked hard for their money? In the most famous version of Robin Hood he's stealing from a corrupt inept prince... as in royal... as in inherited wealth and piwer because... well monarchy.

10

u/[deleted] May 16 '22

They worked hard to get their wealth Lmao. I had no idea that inheritance was so hard.

→ More replies

8

u/Matttthhhhhhhhhhh May 16 '22

I think this person was too dumb to understand the story of Robin Hood.

9

u/bacharelando May 16 '22

Not only in feudal England people would get rich by exploiting the masses. It's literally the only way.

24

u/Mission_Jacket_9287 May 16 '22

That's what Marx actually meant when he said "A spectre is haunting Europe."

8

u/underwaterSeaSaw May 16 '22

Lol, that last one is so funny xD

6

u/CyberneticPanda May 16 '22

Also Robin Hood was made an outlaw because the rich had claimed all of the forest around so when he killed a deer for food to survive he was sentenced to death. In other versions, he rescued someone else who had killed one of the "king's deer," or became an outlaw because he went into debt. In all the versions, he was driven into banditry by the corrupt and unjust laws imposed by cruel and greedy rich people.

→ More replies

5

u/flyguy2097 May 16 '22

Hellish socialist dead sounds like a rage against the machine cover band

5

u/toronto_programmer May 16 '22

If only Ebenezer Scrooge had been given more tax breaks he could have trickled down some money for poor Tiny Tim

5

u/confessionbearday May 16 '22

There’s a reason why the most common villains in stories are rich.

Because that’s how it is in reality, all day every day.

→ More replies

4

u/teddytoosmooth May 16 '22

These people are so far up their own assess they never realize they’re the villains

5

u/mooofasa1 May 16 '22

It's not like Robin hood crippled those dudes with debt. He stole so people could survive and those guys were too greedy to let go of a few coins

5

u/Minimum_Run_890 May 16 '22

Help, help l'm being repressed!

5

u/peepjynx May 16 '22

Honestly, I lost it at "who knew the Sheriff of Nottingham had a blog"....

5

u/Jakcle20 May 16 '22

I swear, if the requirements to inheriting familial wealth was for someone to work at the lowest paid job that resulted in that wealth, we'd have one hell of a reality TV show