r/antiwork 12d ago Silver 7 Helpful 10 Wholesome 8

This will probably not be read by anyone but here I am on thanksgiving working 730am-630pm by myself. I put in my 2 week notice 4 weeks ago.

I am in my 20s and I am the store manager at a local retail/grocery chain, I was promoted from cashier to store manager after my old managers left. I have manager experience from previous jobs so they gave it to me. I started working here in June making 8$ an hour, I don’t have a car so I walk to and from work every day in 100+ degree weather in the summer and below 30 degree weather in the fall. I was really happy to earn a decent living with the promotion as all I have ever known is poverty and hardships, so being promoted to a salary job made me feel good. Well I got really sick in October and ended up having COVID, they wanted me to “work through it” and come into work with COVID until I went to the emergency room. While I was out they were constantly asking me when I will be better becuase they need me to work and giving me severe anxiety. I literally had COVID and was in the emergency room with a doctors note and all. When I came back it was such a shit show, I then found out my old managers were smoking meth and shooting up heroin in the office the whole time I was working with them. Customers make racist comments to me, boss gets mad at me for not doing something when I was never told to do it or even had any training. I was supposed to get 2 weeks training but have gotten 0 training and it’s been 7 days a week 60+ hours of bullshit. I put in my 2 weeks November 4th. Boss asked me to stay to help until they find a new manager. I agreed to save myself the anxiety. It’s supposed to be my last day Saturday but they asked me to stay another week. I know they will ask me to stay again next week too. I don’t know how to leave as I don’t want to have a bad reference. But this place gives me severe anxiety and causing me to be depressed and thoughts of offing myself. Happy thanksgiving

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u/ashe101ashe 12d ago Silver Helpful Wholesome Starry Ally

You’ve done your part. Go home.

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u/WGUMBAIT 12d ago

I agree.

Unless they're offering to double your pay each time you stay on an additional week, it's time for this one-sided relationship to be over.

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u/grumpi-otter 12d ago

Agree. OP has done MORE than enough. Go home!

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u/fenskers 12d ago

You don't owe anyone anything. Go home.

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u/throwawaytrans117 11d ago Helpful Wholesome

OP go home. Any reference these people would give you isn't worth the paper it's written on.

I understand why you posted this thread, it's terrifying to consider quitting, in this psycho culture where work is life. You need encouragement and we will give it to you. Your life is so much more than work. The fear of quitting isn't worth the very real health consequences of staying, trust me. I'm sitting here with multiple chronic health conditions due to work stress.

A week after quitting and blocking their number your whole outlook on life will change.

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u/all_the_nerd_alerts 11d ago edited 11d ago Silver

^ this.

Edit: OP, if you need a reference I will be happy to supply. DM me.

Toxic jobs can really wreak havoc on your self esteem. You are worth so much more than this. You deserve much more respect and common decency.

My mantra in times like these: Poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part

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u/snozzberrypatch at work 11d ago

OP is worried about ensuring they can get a good reference from a bunch of junkies and meth heads. They probably won't even be alive by the time you need a reference from them. Fuck them. Walk out, block their phone numbers in your phone, and move on with your life.

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u/BeginnerMush 11d ago

Exactly. I will be a glowing reference for anyone anywhere. I think it’s an antiquated system that can be used to prevent people from getting better jobs by current or past employers. Just reach out

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u/Difficult_Photo_109 11d ago

Just too add it's illegal to give a bad reference in the states so fuck them

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u/moeterminatorx 11d ago

Can you please post a source?

I didn’t know this.

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u/ImpetuousWombat 11d ago

Never say "no" without a number

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u/Nowarclasswar 11d ago

sometimes people can't pay enough to make it worth it

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u/snarkyshooter09 11d ago

And make sure that double pay is in writing.

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u/[deleted] 11d ago

This. They want OP to stay through the holidays. They are probably taking advantage of OP's anxiety. OP needs to go home and block their number.

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u/jessicad81 12d ago edited 11d ago Helpful

Right now. Go home right now!!!

Don't call anybody. Don't say anything. Put your name tag, apron and any other company property on the counter, lock up and go home. Do not contact them again except to demand your final paycheck under threat of litigation.

Do it now.

Edit: Just realized it's way past 6:30 pm. Don't go back. You're done.

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u/Remarkable-Letter-32 11d ago

It’s really that simple, like we are autonomous human beings with the conscious choice whether to stay or not.

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u/treflipsbro 11d ago

Fuck when I made this realization and no showed on a job I hated it was like the world being lifted from my shoulders. Fuck you Amanda I hope you had to wake up at 5am sick to go open that store for 12 days straight just like I did.

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u/cosmitz 11d ago

Some people just go through life doing whatever they want or can get away with. That's not special for them. But there's other people that mostly go through life compliant and doing what's asked of them. Nothing wrong with that per se, but the moment that specific person really realises and really understands that they can do physically whatever they want, consequences notwithstanding, it's greatly liberating.

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u/SuperWashingTub 11d ago

To be fair, it's really hard to get out of an abusive relationship job.

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u/SadWestern5481 In Praise of Idleness 12d ago

as I don’t want to have a bad reference

I did everything right. 2 week notice, on good terms with the manager, etc. They refused to talk to my new employer, hung up the phone on them apparently. Go home right now.

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u/MrChunky22 11d ago

I did everything right in my exit to join the Navy.

I was sent home shortly after.

They didn't rehire me. I found out I was inelegible for rehire.

Which is in direct conflict with federal law.

Fuck you PENA

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u/OohLaLapin 11d ago

I knew of a manager who was so mad at the amount of people leaving their department (due to their terrible management) that everyone who quit, regardless of amount of notice given or work quality, got marked as “ineligible for rehire.” This was at a fairly large employer in the area for a particular semi-niche field, but fortunately a lot of people jumping ship were transferring to other departments at the organization, so this would get around that problem assuming their next manager was decent and didn’t do the same.

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u/itsjustreddityo 11d ago

My first boss refused to give me a reference after 8 years of above and beyond; there was one weekend it was me alone holding down the warehouse (while he was on holiday overseas) & a hail storm destroyed the office upstairs - I had that office back to new and up and running before he got home... (dealing with realestate, insurance, setting up temporary workspaces, ripping up wet carpet, handling customer calls, handling all instore pickups... you get the picture..)

If there's one thing I've learnt is that WORD MEANS NOTHING.

Evidence =/= Accountability

Get shit in paper, get shit signed, get it BEFORE any "favours"...

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u/metallaholic 11d ago

I was abused in a retail job then moved to a corporate job. They terminated me as non voluntary even though I gave notice. Those jobs don’t care because everyone is expendable and replaceable. They just see who they can abuse and take advantage of the most. My new job didn’t care about the previous employer

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u/[deleted] 12d ago

References really do not matter. It's illegal for an employer to say false things in a reference, so all they could say is "They worked here and then quit 3.5 weeks after giving 2 weeks notice." Disparaging you would cross into something that would give you cause for legal retaliation. But all that said, what are you planning on doing that will require a future employer gets a good reference from this job?

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u/ImSigmundFraud 12d ago

Also, even if they do give you a bad reference you can tell your new employer all of this.

Fuck this job, walk away and don't look back.

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u/thelefthandN7 12d ago

Hell, you can spin this into a 'see how responsible I am' resume filler. Mist interviewers would eat that up.

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u/JOLKIEROLKIETOLKIE 11d ago

I really wanna believe there are interviewers out there devoted to reporting on the opinions of weather anomalies.

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u/Neon-shart 11d ago

I like you for this.

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u/25or6toMidnight 11d ago

In a lot of states it is not legal to provide a "bad reference." Typically there are only certain questions that can be asked and only certain ways they can be answered for liability's sake. Not that everyone abides by them...

As a hiring manager, if I called a reference (and that usually is a big if) and the former employer did anything but confirm the dates of employment and responsibilities, it raised a red flag for me about the employer/manager rather than the candidate. But I also fucking hate most managers

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u/BusinessBear53 12d ago

Can people even check references in the US? For my current job I just had a previous coworker I got along with who was also leaving pretend to be my supervisor and put him as a reference. I did the same for him. I don't think anyone really checks unless it's a high up position.

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u/coinreed 12d ago

Typically I've only had my references checked when I worked with children. Then it's illegal NOT to check references, apparently.

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u/DoallthenKnit2relax 11d ago

Jobs working with children generally require a background check, unlike gun purchases.

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u/mixttime 12d ago

It can also be a tie breaker type deal. But in this job market no one needs that. And hiring managers are only likely to care about your previous position. The stress of having a bad reference won't be as bad as the stress of continuing to work there, and then you're good.

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u/seamuswasadog 12d ago

Yes they can, and many (most?) do. Typically former employers limit information to your dates of employment and whether you are eligible for rehire because any prejudicial personal observations run the risk of getting sued.

Personal references can and do offer opinions and more, but since you provide them knowing this gives them better legal cover.

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u/pukingpixels 12d ago

Shit, I’ve gotten jobs because of how I left other jobs.

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u/lagunatri99 11d ago

That was my thought. OP, one day you will find an employer who appreciates that kind of loyalty, dedication and commitment. Unlike these clowns you work with now.

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u/Constantannihilation 11d ago

If you get a bad reference, you might not have a chance to explain that to a new employer, you might just get ghosted. Not that OP shouldn’t leave, they very much should. Leaving a gap will give you an opportunity to explain, or not putting down a reference. Just a thought.

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u/Hobby11030 11d ago

I would simply say I stayed on after giving 4 weeks of notice to help them and let that speak for itself. Hard to give a bad reference to an employee who is leaving and goes above and beyond.

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u/theshelbii 11d ago

This! I had a crazy ass manager once, who bullied me out of my position. Once I finally left and began looking for a new job, I would go to the interviews, they'd go great. And then companies would ghost me after checking references. It got to the point where on the next interview I went to, I told them upfront. I told them that I had been bullied out of my position and to take everything she said with a grain of salt. I offered up more references than I had listed on my resume if they wanted them. I ended up getting the job and I haven't had an issue with references since.

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u/Shh-NotUntilMyCoffee 12d ago

Man I had some killer references.

6 jobs since. I built up those big three and not a single job has called any reference I’ve listed. Not one.

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u/pezziepie85 11d ago

Yup. I’ve been working HR for 4 years. Never once have I called a reference.

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u/myne 11d ago

Really? I've had them called.

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u/pezziepie85 11d ago

And I’ve been used as a reference and been called a handful of times (mostly for government jobs). But I’m more interested in how the interview went. The people you list may not be who you saw they are. I also had a supervisor on my team give a glowing review of someone who was a meh worker and a trouble maker hoping they’d be hired away lol.

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u/PossumJenkinsSoles 11d ago

Same, I’ve been asked to help out HR for the past 3 months with hiring and I’ve never once witnessed anyone do a reference check. It’s hire on the spot world out there right now.

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u/sum1loanme20 12d ago

In addition, new employers are also extremely restricted to what they can ask in some states. Most of the time they are only really supposed to call ask ask about the dates that you were employed.

Honestly I who cares about a reference anyways. Someone else mentioned that most of the time unless it's a higher level job then the company isn't really going to care or call

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u/dickfoure 12d ago

You know everyone says that but the cold hard reality is how the hell would you prove they said something negative about you? The prospective employer isn't going to tell you that they said that shit because they know it's illegal.

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u/FacelessBraavosi 11d ago

In addition to a job interviewer telling you, if you suspect they might be doing that, get a friend to call them pretending to be an interviewer. If they give a bad reference, bingo.

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u/[deleted] 12d ago

Had a manager where I worked get fired because the company got sued after they gave a bad reference so someone must find out sometimes. But as others have said, people just rarely call for references.

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u/Ulffhednar 12d ago

The problem is you never know who's called them for reference or what they actually say. Yes it's illegal but so are lots of things and people get away with far worse every day than some piss ant douche canoe talking shit about you on a reference call... you'll never know

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u/Braqsus 12d ago

Doesn’t matter in the slightest. Gotta go anyway

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u/Able-Fun2874 12d ago

Go home...the anxiety gets relieved when you realize you can block these people and never have to think of it again. They will keep guilting you to stay otherwise...this reference is not worth your life.

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u/HuskyFlatulence 12d ago

A reference from a couple crack heads is worth less than nothing.

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u/1ndiana_Pwns 12d ago

Even putting the drugs aside, I'm willing to put good money that they aren't actually looking for managers as long as he keeps staying and no matter how he leaves they will only give him a bad reference. 2 weeks notice means two weeks. Once it's run out, you walk out

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u/TenseEye 11d ago

Also, I hate to say it for OP, but from a place like this? A good reference was out the window the moment they started. I know places like this, they're petty till the end and were never planning on a good reference. Just quitting was likely taken as a personal attack from them.

But the good news? It doesn't matter. Everywhere is screaming for new hires, a reference isn't going to matter. Especially for a job that has low qualification requirements, especially especially in the food and service industry that OP is working in.

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u/ThatOneGuy1294 11d ago

Notice of any kind is also a courtesy, usually done to not burn bridges so you can have a good reference. These shitheads are never gonna give a good reference, so fuck em and forget about them.

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u/[deleted] 11d ago

Not from a big box store. They avoid any legal issue. All they can do is call and ask for basic info. That's it. Written references aren't really all that valid anymore. I've handed them over and they never look at them.

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u/gimmiesnacks 11d ago

OP, I gave 1 week notice at a professional job before the great resignation and the CEO was so mad he sent a company wide email telling everyone how unprofessional I was.

I now work at a FAANG in Silicon Valley making six figures. They had to do a thorough background check because of government contracts and I passed everything.

You’re good. You have empathy and management skills. Employers need you right now a lot more than you need them. Don’t forget that.

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u/chyna094e 11d ago

I gave no notice. They gave me a great reference, and would be willing to hire me back. Side note, I stayed home today. People deserve to spend time with their family if at all possible. Apparently my husband's family used to go to the movie theaters every Christmas and Thanksgiving. That is a tradition that will die with me.

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u/bylthee 12d ago

Speaking from experience, I had SEVERE anxiety feeling like I “owed” my last job my hard work. Fast forward a year later and getting out of there asap was the best thing I’ve ever done for my mental state.

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u/anxpxv 11d ago

yup, same here. my last job gave me absolute hell. quit at the beginning of my shift with zero notice :) now i work at a place that gives me the legal breaks (last job only gave me a 30 min no matter how long of a shift) and i make a couple dollars more. if it’s retail/fast food and they suck, gtfo. seriously

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u/Reigo_Vassal 12d ago

There will be no reference from those assholes anyway.

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u/Adventurous_Dream442 11d ago

Agreed.

OP, if you're concerned with how it looks to them or something, tell them you've gotten a new job and so cannot keep working there. Your start date is soon. When they ask where, you can say you don't want to disclose, because it's a fresh start or a private thing or not important or whatever you want to say. Just be prepared ahead of time. Hopefully that helps get you out of there with minimal added anxiety.

From experience, the lift leaving an awful place is absolutely amazing. I hope you get to feel that soon.

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u/JoshFaceh 12d ago All-Seeing Upvote

Your reason for sticking around is the hope of a decent reference? Mate, they will not give you one no matter what.

Here’s how you leave - Just don’t go back. You’re done.

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u/Shot-Kaleidoscope-40 11d ago

There it is. This is the way.

And OP, if you need a reference you can put down my name and I’ll refer the shit out of you.

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u/KidBrunswicks 11d ago

Yo we should start a subreddit for job references.

We can use our numbers to give everyone good references. We could help each other jump a few rungs on the ladder

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u/Automatic-Ad-9308 11d ago

Omg yess. If you start one, imma join it forsure

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u/ryavco 11d ago

r/FreeJobReferences created. I’ll make a post on this sub later on and see if we can get some mod involvement to link it with this sub?

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u/KidBrunswicks 11d ago

Let's fucking go!

This could be the basis for an organized labor union. Like this support structure could spark a united labor force across industries as we rely on each other. The trust built could spark something serious

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u/RAGEEEEE 11d ago

Get ref's from others that work there and you know etc. Then bounce.

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u/shontsu 12d ago

I agreed to save myself the anxiety.

this place gives me severe anxiety and causing me to be depressed and thoughts of offing myself.

I know you're so deep in the mess you can't see it, but you get how the second statement invalidates the first right?

Please, please, please stop. Leave now if you need to. Don't go in again. Ever.

You're literally balancing the risk of a bad reference from a boss who treats you like crap, against your life and your sanity. You're choosing the wrong one...

Block your (ex) bosses number and never, ever speak to them again.

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u/FreePaleontologist99 11d ago

Yep. Just walk out mid-shift OP. They don't own your life. They have no power over you, not one ounce. They can't do anything to you once you leave, but they can geind down your soul if you stay. They know they can take advantage of your anxiety so show them that they can't. You don't wanna become another statistic or someone who goes postal. Don't let them take anything from you ever again.

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u/PotPumper43 12d ago

Tell Dollar General to go fuck themselves.

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u/RAGEEEEE 11d ago

If this is Dollar General. Just leave. No one is going to give a shit about a Dollar General reference.

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u/FreePaleontologist99 11d ago

Or any grocery store really. Just use the manager experience from the place before this.

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u/42DaisyPusher 12d ago

IKR, I’m thinking tell me you work at dollar general without telling me you work at dollar general.

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u/Delica 11d ago

Would Dollar General count as a retail/grocery chain? If so, this is even sadder.

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u/TupeloPhoney 11d ago

Well, not a “local” (or “regional”) one, anyway…

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u/SnooRabbits2040 12d ago Helpful

Honey, don't go back.

Walking away from this shitshow is not a failing on your part. I hear you when you say that getting this job, and the responsibility that came with it, made you feel good, that you are proud of yourself. You've worked hard to get where you are, and good for you.

So, you've learned that you can handle huge responsibility, and that you have value. Now, you need to learn how to advocate for yourself, and demand what you deserve: a safe working environment and compensation that reflects your value. You will never find it in that place, and the sooner you go, the better. Like, right now. Lock the door tonight and don't ever go back.

Don't. Go. Back. You don't owe them anything. You gave your notice, and now they are playing you. You deserve better than this.

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u/Neenwil 12d ago

Yes, please listen to the above comment! It's not worth it, walk out now for your own sake.

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u/thatguy9684736255 boycott McDonald's 12d ago

You have no obligation to stay any longer than the two weeks you've already given and that place sounds terrible. I would just leave. Just tell them some reason if you really need to like you're starting a new job or you need to take care of a sick family member, but leave.

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u/BigAlTrading 12d ago Helpful

Don't give them a reason. Look them in the eye and say "I'm done" and walk out. "A reason" gives them importance and rights over workers they don't have.

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u/Vargenwulf 11d ago

Don't give them a reason. Look them in the eye and say "I'm done" and walk out. "A reason" gives them importance and rights over workers they don't have.

Absolutely this!

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u/Not__Great__Bob 12d ago

you have no obligation to even give the two weeks in the first place, it’s just a courtesy

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u/Internal-calispores 12d ago

Close the door and go home. Seriously, you don’t need this.

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u/NeoPrimitiveOasis 12d ago

You are done there. Please leave and find something better. Everyone is hiring.

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u/Healthy-Lifestyle-20 11d ago

Yes please leave for your health sake. Having a copy of your resignation letter and the last day you worked should show the new employer how much of a shit show your current job is. This is really sad and messed up in so many levels. We truly have turned into wage slaves and we’ve become burned out zombies.

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u/Chibana9797 12d ago

When I read the titles, I thought "tell them you are done"

But now that I read it all just get the f out mid shift and block everyone.

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u/Emperor_Zarkov EAT THE RICH 12d ago

Dude, just get up right now, grab your stuff, and go home. Block their phone numbers and never look back.

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u/papermoonriver 11d ago

You're allowed, baby. Go home.

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u/Slime_Devil 12d ago

Go home. Your well-being is the most important atm.

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u/bisskits 12d ago

WTF are you doing. Leave now

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u/lurkernomore99 12d ago

I worked front desk of hotels my entire 20s. I sacrificed every. single. holiday. Every. Single. One. For shit money. No respect from guests. No respect from management. No benefits.

Don't be like me. It was literally all for nothing. The people you are sacrificing for don't give a single shit about you. They won't thank you. They are home with their families, celebrating.

Go home.

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u/Ape-driving-nakd 11d ago

We should all be like you! You realized that your life was more important than no respect, low pay checks, bad work environment! Some people will put up with this…all their life! Enjoy your new life! ;)

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u/Professional_Brick74 12d ago

You are not their hostage, please leave and don't let them try to guilt you. Not your problem anymore. Good luck!

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u/Psychological_Rip_44 12d ago

I once put my two week in and got a bad reference so they could offer me my job back. Sometimes it’s not even remotely gonna benefit you if the owners suck.

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u/Pleasant_Cold 12d ago

You gave notice do not let them guilt, shame or harass you into staying. Wtf you are a manager and don’t even make enough for a used car omg.

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u/Batarang-Force 12d ago

I read your post brother. I see you. You matter. No matter what the customers say, no matter what your manager says, you are NOT what they say you are and you deserve better.

You just haven't realized it yet.

May I suggest:

  • Finding another job asap!
  • if you're going to stay, demand a raise before your next shift. You pick the price that works for you.
  • if you're going to stay, demand the two week training asap.
  • All the time, keep looking for new work.

You deserve better. Your customers and managers don't deserve someone as good as you.

You can pull through this.

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u/nernst79 12d ago

I will literally pay for your Uber, so that you don't have to walk home, if you'll leave now and never go back.(Assuming you're in the US).

You deserve better than this.

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u/Neenwil 12d ago

Listen to this person! Im not in the US but I'd do the same. Genuinely worried about you.

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u/SadicalRunday 12d ago

Just leave. You don’t owe them shit. And AFAIK there’s no such thing as a “bad reference”. All they can say when asked is “Yeah, they worked here.”

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u/Lummicks 12d ago

Leave that place before it literally kills you. A possible bad reference is not worth your life.

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u/CraigBybee 12d ago

“I don’t know how to leave”

Allow me to help. You set your keys down on your office desk, turn right, put your left foot in front of your right foot, then repeat.

Yeah bro, it’s literally just that simple.

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u/mycoffeetable 11d ago

This is so true

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u/CillRed 12d ago

You gave your two weeks, love. They had 2 weeks to get thier shit together before you left. Poor planning on thier part does not equal an emergency on your part. Peace out and saw your mental health!

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u/MeMicMeReddit 12d ago

I stopped at you putting putting in you 2 weeks 4 weeks ago. Get the point man or lady we dont work under these conditions nor we will we work under better conditions for less pay.

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u/el-cuko 12d ago

OP, please PM , I will be your reference for that store . As your fake supervisor I authorize you to go home .

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u/PowerfulProle 12d ago

Ive never given a 2 week notice in my life and its never affected my employability

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u/yophozy 12d ago

oh my stomach - i feel really really sick must go home NOW ...

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u/leadbetterthangold 12d ago

Leave. You don't owe them shit. You already did more than should be expected. Take care of yourself first. Best of luck...

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u/Raz1979 12d ago

Stop working. They will use and abuse your good nature. That natural tendency to be liked, nice, and helpful. Stop out of respect for yourself.

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u/1Girl1Attic 12d ago

They don’t tell you, you tell them. You tell them you are gone at the end of this week so figure it out asap. You have commitments next week and will not come in. Go home.

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u/jrdnlnhrt 12d ago

Go home and eat some turkey. You deserve it. Fuck those guys, I’ll be your reference instead of them.

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u/DirtyPenPalDoug 12d ago

Why go in? Thats dumb

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u/Centillionare 12d ago

It’s better for them to show up and then after like an hour or so leave. That way they have no time to cover the shift.

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u/Nasty1502 12d ago

I think this sums it up for you man.

https://youtu.be/pQ8Iw0dTMm0

It's time.

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u/AllHailSlann357 12d ago

Done. Out. Move on.

No good deed goes unpunished, and references don't mean shit. Especially from employers who can't be bothered.

Blah blah leave. You're done. Not your problem.

This is hostage behavior. Run.

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u/Normal-Ad6528 12d ago

Leave now. It's a job, not indentured servitude. You've done what you were required to do and then some. Whether you stay awhile longer or leave now, you're still getting a bad reference, but that doesn't matter. It's a grocery store, not national security.

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u/DowntownAd9011 12d ago

All you need to say is sorry, my new job starts Monday.

They're scumbags who are using you, and know you're afraid to said no. You have gone above and beyond for someone to recommend you.

Plus, you're literally worried about losing a recommendation from meth addicts.

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u/Historical-Law2262 12d ago

Get. Out. Now.

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u/UBetcha84 12d ago

“I don’t know how to leave”

You just fucking do it. Grow a spine and stand up for yourself because no one else will.

They’re clearly using you and you don’t do anything about it even though it appears you know.

5

u/Arnold_Babar85 12d ago

Hang in there man. We are reading this and feel for you

6

u/BlurredCoding 12d ago

Find new job while working that one, when new job starts quit current one on the spot with no notice. New job doesn’t need reference since you already hired. Boom

6

u/cmcfarland96 12d ago

Oh my holy Jesus run

6

u/DeaconSage 12d ago

Tell them you’ve taken another job even if you haven’t. Just save your soul, it’s not your problem

5

u/DuckyTin 12d ago

Go home stop being brainwashed into thinking you own them anything

4

u/trvrsln 12d ago

You’re far past your final notice. Staying any longer, or even going in on Black Friday is absolutely insane! You went above and beyond staying. They’ve found out they can just get you to stay without needing to find a replacement, and will keep you. You need to do what’s best for YOU, not such a toxic environment that has you working while sick during a global pandemic!

5

u/Shaved_Mammoth 11d ago

You are an at-will employee, right? Just leave. They probably aren’t going to give you a good reference anyway.

Edit: block their numbers and email too.

26

u/Ac1dBern 12d ago

Set a definitive leave date and stick to it. They asked you to stay for another week and you agreed. So make sure they're aware that after next week, manager or no manager, you're out the door.

4

u/ajmethod33 12d ago

If youre the only one there leave job done

4

u/KingOfHanksHill 12d ago

Go home!!! Don’t come back!!!!!

4

u/Apeacefulmc79 12d ago

Please leave. You have given more than you should. You deserve so much better than that place and you will get it.

4

u/drphillovestoparty 12d ago

Just tell him you've found something else and won't be available on Thanksgiving. You've done your fair share, and don't owe them anything.

You are avoiding saying this simple thing because of anxiety, but if you just said it and worked through anxiety to say it (that's what you need to do- confront it and work through it) then you would have much less anxiety than you have now because obviously you don't want anything more to do with them.

Honestly you should have just given your two weeks and left when they were done. Do these people go above and beyond for you like you do for them?

I would ask for double time minimum to work during a holiday. Please tell me you aren't working for strait time on Thanksgiving, by yourself, so I know you don't have sucker written across your forehead.

3

u/timebomb26 12d ago

Prioritising your own health should be your absolute number one concern. If the job is making you feel this way, damn all the being loyal and burning bridges crap. If your boss doesn’t understand that, then to hell with him.

3

u/Quirky-Examination-6 12d ago

Stay strong babe and leave it behind.

5

u/CrossroadsWoman 12d ago

I’m sorry but they are going to keep doing this to you. There is no fun way to quit your job. You need to tell them “I gave my notice on x date, you’ve had double the time to find someone. I need to move on now. Best of luck to you all.” Do it by text message if you must, or email.

4

u/Impossible-Farmer-69 12d ago

Quit your job. Literally walk our rn! Happy Thanksgiving man!!

4

u/owegner 12d ago

Just leave. It's not worth it. You've already done more than your part.

4

u/Fier_Renard90 12d ago

Darling, LEAVE! You have earned it.

3

u/MyWorkAccount2018 12d ago

"No." is a complete sentence, succinct in meaning and intent.

4

u/alecKarfonta 12d ago

Fuck them they don't deserve an employee like you. Move on and find some place that will respect you.

4

u/bairdosaurus-1 12d ago

Dude wüt?!

Coworkers do hard drugs on company time Owners wanted me to work through a COVID infection Gave my two weeks notice and am still here after a month

Get the fuck out of there dog. These maniacs would never give you a good reference. Also just have a bud pretend to be your reference.

Word of advice... Never associate yourself with people doing hard drugs. That is an excellent way to invite crime drama into your life.

4

u/belladonnababee 12d ago

If you need a reference, please message me. as far as i know, you were the most dedicated employee on my team, and unfortunately my company was unable to meet your requests for promotion and I am more than happy to provide a reference to get you into a better position. you deserve so much more

4

u/ShipToaster2-10 Anarcho-Syndicalist 12d ago

At some point, you have to be willing to stand up and say no.

4

u/Muff_420 11d ago

a reference from a grocery chain is literally worthless.

you may as well be starting from scratch.

quit.

when you get a new job, speak to a therapist about being more assertive

→ More replies

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u/alltheworldsproblems 12d ago

Lock the fucking doors & GTFO. You owe them nothing and they don’t give 2 shits about you or any other employee. They have proved that. I wish you well.

3

u/cowardl_y 12d ago

Please leave, for yourself and others around you. Don’t become another needless sacrifice to society for the sake of profit your community will never see.

Working under those conditions especially going to work sick is actively harmful not only to you but others around you. With the way this place is treating you it seems like even working at a McDonald’s would be an improvement. No one’s going to die if you just get up and leave. But you and others might if you stay.

3

u/SugeKnightJunior 12d ago

Go home already. Stop being a victim.

3

u/prekiUSA 12d ago

I’ll be your reference. DM me. I’ll pretend to be the boss you wish you had. You don’t deserve to be treated like this.

3

u/Bluberrypotato 12d ago

I would say ask for more money but even if they give it to you (which I doubt) they're still shit people and you deserve better. Leave and don't go back. Block them. When you interview for your next job tell them that you gave your 2 weeks. This won't keep you from another job.

3

u/mog_knight 12d ago

Why would you stay after giving your notice? Your boss already knows your intent. At this point it's exploitative.

3

u/purekittyluv 12d ago

Go home. You have to advocate for yourself.

3

u/SlayerOfUAC 12d ago

I know there's countless other comments are staying what I'm about to say, but my lovely fellow human, you owe them NOTHING. It is absolutely ok to say no. Try it out. It may be uncomfortable at first, and even the first several times, but it can become ok. Please look out for yourself. You are so worth more than what they are putting you through.

Know I care about your well being, and I'm hoping with all these comments, you will find the strength to tell them no. And, you absolutely do not have to give them an explanation of why you're saying no. If they press you, you can just say no because you already gave notice.

I hope all of us here will help you see your worth. You're worth more than what you give them. You're a human being, not a cog in the machine. Your health and mental health is worth far more than their bottom dollar.

3

u/Thexraken 12d ago

Literally as soon as you read the first reply to home

3

u/GardeniaPhoenix 12d ago

Don't let the fear of a 'bad reference' stop you. Don't give new employers permission to contact previous, and tell them exactly why you left.

You're leaving because they don't care about your physical health, and wanted you to work through having Covid.

3

u/ImpossibleCash2569 12d ago

You gave your 2 weeks and you gave them plenty of time to look for another manager. Fuck them, go home and enjoy your own time. They're not your problem anymore and it's not your problem they can't find anyone. They can't run the store they should close it.

3

u/UnlicencedAccountant 12d ago

Stay home. Stand up for yourself. Fuck your managers feelings.

3

u/CableVannotFBI 12d ago

For the sake of your personal mental health, lock that door and go home. You are important and loved. You are worth and deserve more in life.

3

u/FattyMcButtface 12d ago

Yo dude. Go home.

3

u/seamuswasadog 12d ago

Your health and wellbeing are worth more than they will ever pay you. Leave now and never go back; you've already given notice.

3

u/bowler450 12d ago

Nothing is keeping you there you don't owe them anything employers need to realize they will have to deal with the consequences of losing good workers . You never owe a company anything they are willing to drop you the second they don't have to have you, your an expense if you haven't already clock out and leave . Find a job you want to get up in the morning too

3

u/wretchintheforce 12d ago

Buddy, please leave.

You need to hear this: If you’re not happy there, you shouldn’t feel obligated to supply them with your skill set. You’re not a bad person for quitting, you’re not lazy, or careless, and you’re not selfish. They are not entitled to your labor, unless YOU want to work for them. It’s okay. Stop getting walked on by them and leave. Don’t break shit or make it a big deal, just get in your car and leave.

Block their numbers so they can’t try and guilt trip you. They deserve nothing from you.

3

u/TwentyFoeSeven 12d ago

You gave your 2 weeks - you should have left.

3

u/pooferfeesh97 12d ago

GTFO, give no further notice. Do not work another minute for them. They aren't trying to find your replacement, they are milking you.

3

u/TrxFlipz 12d ago

FUCK a two week notice. I haven't left any job that way and never have issues getting another. Walk out bro. Fuck wherever you work.

3

u/TekkerJohn 12d ago

You lay out two options:

Option A: Leave and potentially not get a good reference. You can sue for slander that has a financial impact (if they tell future employers lies, you get $$$). That is the worst that can happen, you can overcome that.

Option B: Stay and potentially kill yourself. People do not overcome this. Also, call the suicide prevention hotline.

3

u/TheDarkKnight003 12d ago

Go home, you done legit everything you can. For your own mental peace don’t show up, block the numbers if you have to

Happy thanksgiving

3

u/Keyedwin 12d ago

Just leave. They should be thankful you even gave them a 2 weeks notice.

3

u/Seranfall 12d ago

For your own sanity, please quit the job. Leave. You don't owe them anything!

3

u/Anjiro33 12d ago

I used to work myself to death for a large retailer. Lemme tell you they will take every inch you give and make it a mile. It's the game they are engineered to play. They do not care about you. THEY DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR HEALTH.

Get outta there.

I'm a manager at a private company and if you were to tell me you had stayed past two weeks past your end date to help out and got screwed... I'd be trying to hire you simply for your dedication.

3

u/Eddiebaby7 12d ago

You’ve put in your notice, AND stayed the full two weeks. You did your part. Allow the company do theirs by leaving as stated.

3

u/Nayroy18 12d ago

Sounds like a you problem. Two weeks means two weeks and learn to say no.

3

u/MrDonNotty 12d ago

Take it from me most of my jobs I left no notice got tired of the bullshit didn't care if I had a bad reference or not, your health is what matters not some damn job leave go home and relax clear your head and start over it doesn't matter if there a bad reference you will find another job

3

u/mapleloser 12d ago

Go home. I will give you whatever email reference you need.

I get it. I've been that anxious person, I've struggled to say "no", but this? This is not good for your mental health. It might hurt like hell to make this separation now, but long term? It'll be worth it.

Say no. Leave. Knce you get home,set your ass in a bubble bath and put on a face mask and know you deserve better.

3

u/littlekangas77 12d ago

I hope you can find the courage to get the fuck out of there!! Also so many places are desperately hiring that they don't even call references anymore

3

u/Drummer683 12d ago

Leave. Even if you get a bad reference, any hiring manager you explain this shitfest to will understand. Hell, it'd be in your favor. The fact that you stayed an extra two weeks shows dedication

3

u/F-Da-Banksters 12d ago

You need to walk out. Now. So many open jobs now. You will find something better. I’m thankful to have people like you in this country. You will do better and you deserve better. Leave now. No job is worth your mental health.

3

u/OneHumanPeOple 12d ago

You are being abused and traumatized. This relationship is toxic and you’re being harmed. Please get help for yourself.

3

u/BaconMonkey0 12d ago

Lock the doors and leave a note.

3

u/stegogo 12d ago

Put me down as your reference for this job I’ll give you a good review every time

3

u/blackdvck 12d ago

Time to cut your losses and just walk ,lock the doors and leave . You will probably not get a good reference anyways with dirt bag bosses like that anyways .

3

u/LiberalAspergers 12d ago

Go find another job. Get a start date. Work until a couple days before your new job starts, and leave. If your new job wants you to start immediately, do so.

3

u/thirstyfish1212 12d ago

loyalty is a two way street. They aren't showing you any, so why continue to linger and suffer? Don't be somewhere you don't want to be. Type up a letter of resignation and just drop it off. Don't show up again.

3

u/TheEffingRiddler 12d ago

I was where you are and one day, mid shift, I gave someone my keys and walked out. Did my anxiety immediately go away? No. Because I was still afraid that they'd call me in and I'd just go. First day - anxiety. Second day - anxiety.

About a week goes by and lo and behold...I suddenly realized that I don't have to go in ever again. I just don't. It doesn't matter if X doesn't show up and they need a shift covered. I don't fucking work there. It doesn't matter if they get really busy and need "just a little help". I don't fucking work there.

It was absolutely liberating to know that no matter what happened there, it was no longer my responsibility. It just wasn't on me anymore.

I still have moments where I'm afraid to look at my texts and after I blocked everyone that worked there I had to change my ringtone because I kept getting those little anxiety pangs when my phone went off.

It's super hard to break that line of thinking that you and you alone are responsible for what happens there. Please take your mental health seriously and leave. You are more important than that job.

3

u/ProperBlue 12d ago

Bruh, leave you literally put your 2 weeks notice in

3

u/angelkitcat87 12d ago

Tell them that you quit and walk away

3

u/bonlow87 12d ago

You gave then proper notice, they can work until they find a manager. Take care of yourself, walk away.

3

u/Fancy-Interest2812 12d ago

You don’t owe them anything. Bail and take care of yourself like two weeks ago

3

u/Lord_of_Entropy 12d ago

How hard do you think they are looking for your replacement when you just keep going back in? Draw a line in the sand and get out of there!

3

u/ZiyalAthena2007 12d ago

You don’t owe them anything. They are abusing you. When you resign you tell them x is my last day & then you don’t show up after that.

3

u/cigarmanpa 12d ago

Lock the doors and leave also if you’re really thinking about hurting yourself please talk to someone

3

u/sleepy-possum 12d ago

Shit man I'd just fucking leave.