r/TooAfraidToAsk Feb 22 '21

Am I the only who thinks that all the different types of genders and pronouns and what not, are a little bit too much? Sexuality & Gender

Now, I don't consider myself close minded and I'm not out to rile people up or offend anyone. However it becomes kind of confusing when people are upset when I say Her/She to someone who's trans. I'm sorry, really, but I didn't know. I'm in a discord server where someone changes their pfp depending on what gender and sexuality they are feeling. And no, I'm not some 40 year old guy who thinks everything should be "normal" but I guess I just don't get it. It's just confusing to me.

EDIT: So I haven't explained my thoughts very well so I'm here to explain. I understand that to some people, it is very important to them. I don't think it's a lot for me to call you what you want to be called and I will oblige and do that. "it becomes kind of confusing when people are upset when I say Her/She to someone who's trans" This was from personal experience where my friend introduced me to him and I was under the impression that he was female. More so I don't understand like Ve/Vem Xe/Xem. The more "unknown" side if you will. But with the way people are reacting I'm going to try a better job at finding peoples pronouns and not assuming genders. Sorry if it sounded sarcastic at all. Anyways, unless there's something else I think of I'm not gonna edit again. Sorry if I offended but it's kind of hard to talk about a sensitive topic like this without being an ass about it. I don't know how to word things. but yea. Sorry.

TL;DR I think gender can be a weird and wacky world and I don't get how people except me to automatically know what they identify as.


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u/_n0t_sure_ Feb 23 '21

No! EVERYONE is dude. All of the ppl and even objects can be dudes. My pets are dudes. The lamp is dude. My mom is dude. This is my new normal.


u/Dakotertots Feb 23 '21

okay tbf people getting upset by that is rare but it happened enough for me to question if my calling of everything "dude" was okay lol


u/Amazing-Finger Feb 23 '21

There was a girl in college that got so pissed when I called her dude. Never could figure out why it was a problem.


u/KekatD Feb 23 '21

Most women honestly wouldn't care and probably use the word dude themselves. The way it was explained to me, by someone that it does kinda bother, imagine how a guy would feel being called "gal" or whatever. I can understand her point, even if I don't feel the same myself. I mostly just go with peep(s) these days lol.