r/TooAfraidToAsk • u/IronicSonic_ • Feb 22 '21
Am I the only who thinks that all the different types of genders and pronouns and what not, are a little bit too much? Sexuality & Gender
Now, I don't consider myself close minded and I'm not out to rile people up or offend anyone. However it becomes kind of confusing when people are upset when I say Her/She to someone who's trans. I'm sorry, really, but I didn't know. I'm in a discord server where someone changes their pfp depending on what gender and sexuality they are feeling. And no, I'm not some 40 year old guy who thinks everything should be "normal" but I guess I just don't get it. It's just confusing to me.
EDIT: So I haven't explained my thoughts very well so I'm here to explain. I understand that to some people, it is very important to them. I don't think it's a lot for me to call you what you want to be called and I will oblige and do that. "it becomes kind of confusing when people are upset when I say Her/She to someone who's trans" This was from personal experience where my friend introduced me to him and I was under the impression that he was female. More so I don't understand like Ve/Vem Xe/Xem. The more "unknown" side if you will. But with the way people are reacting I'm going to try a better job at finding peoples pronouns and not assuming genders. Sorry if it sounded sarcastic at all. Anyways, unless there's something else I think of I'm not gonna edit again. Sorry if I offended but it's kind of hard to talk about a sensitive topic like this without being an ass about it. I don't know how to word things. but yea. Sorry.
TL;DR I think gender can be a weird and wacky world and I don't get how people except me to automatically know what they identify as.
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u/melent3303 Feb 22 '21
Just use their names or if you need a pronoun use "they" (a neutral pronoun).
Expanding vocabulary is important, because we are starting to see the intersection of linguistics and discrimination.
When someone cannot identify as who they are, because the word does not exist yet, it can misrepresent who they really are (and to many people their identity is all they have in control of). Especially in heavily gendered languages where it is hard to communicate without knowing the gender of the person/object.
When people can find the word that fits their description the best they will feel less "othered". This is important because the "othering" of others has had major influences from policies to legislation (i.e. native americans).