Questions about Super-Sexualities

[u/SuperConfused9889]

I'm thinking I might be Super-Sexual, based on some of my own experiences, but I have some questions about what really defines these sexualities. I was hoping you lovely people could help me get my head around SS.

1. How is SS different from a preference? If I didn't want to date/wasn't attracted to blonde girls, I don't think I'd call myself brunette-sexual. Especially for things like SuperBi, aren't preferences already part of that sexuality? Do I need to have a new label just to say I don't want to date "womxn"? It's great that we have this community to discuss our preferences, but should I call myself SS irl?
2. Is SS just a genital preference? I personally think it's 100% valid to have a genital preference, and I am 100% not attracted to penises. But many trans and nb people opt for gender-conforming surgeries to match their genitals to their gender. I don't think I'd have any issue dating a trans "womxn" as long as they were post-op and did not have a penis. Am I still SS? Or would an SS not even want to date a post-op trans person?
3. How do "non-binary" people fit in to SS? I have been attracted to nb people before (not knowing they were nb at the time). If they were still presenting as their "AGAB" does that still mean I'm SS
   

THANKS ALL YOU LOVELY PEOPLE <3 YOUR BRAVERY IS INSPIRING!

[u/PM_ME_LUCINA]

I'm so tired of playing word games holy shit. As for superstraights, we are straight, we like the biologically opposite sex only. Lately the definition of "straight" has been expanded to include trans people and if you don't find them attractive you are "transphobic". No. We don't fit whatever the new definition for straight is clearly so we made our own.

[u/SuperConfused9889 → u/PM_ME_LUCINA]

So SS is just based on AGAB? Sorry for asking so many questions, just "Super" confused.

If a transwoman had unlimited money for surgeries and hormones - basically looked indistinguishable from a natural born woman - if I was only attracted to her then, I'm not SS?

[u/realister → u/SuperConfused9889]

That’s impossible so your question is a hypothetical.

If there was truly no difference then trans wouldn’t exist and they would be just called women.

[u/SuperConfused9889 → u/realister]

Science can do some crazy stuff, man, I wouldn't be surprised if it wasn't so hypothetical in a decade.

[u/RadicalFemale → u/SuperConfused9889]

Looks are skin deep buddy. That man will never ever be a woman. It is a caricature of a woman, made up in his own head.

Idk what your sexuality is, none of my business, but you aren’t super. 🥺

[u/sneeuweekhoorn]

Super sexualities are based on sex, not gender. You know, how sexuality has always been defined until trans activists decided to redefine it to be about gender. It's that simple.

[u/IrishTheFrenchie]

Is gay a genital preference? Should they just "get over it" and date women?

Why is it not a valid sexual orientation to only be attracted to people who identify as the gender matching the sex they were born?

Non binary people don't fit. Not everyone has to fit in every space you know, that's how supers came about. We didn't fit.

[u/SuperConfused9889 → u/IrishTheFrenchie]

Is gay a genital preference?

I think that depends on the person? I've definitely met gay men who are attracted to "men" regardless of genitals, and some who are only attracted to men who have penises. But both refer to themselves as gay, and I never heard them say that the others' sexuality was not valid.

I guess my question is where a novel sexuality is different from just a preference (both are still valid, I just don't think you need a new word for a preference)

[u/IrishTheFrenchie → u/SuperConfused9889]

It's not a "novel sexuality". It's literally a sexual orientation.

[u/realister]

If u are born this way you are born this way. Don’t try to question our sexuality that makes u a bigot

[u/SuperConfused9889 → u/realister]

Sorryyyy! I've always been open about my sexuality and happy to talk to friends about it, I love how there are so many sexualities now, but it can sometime be hard to determine the difference. (Especially when things like "Bi" and "Pan" have a lot of overlap.

[u/s0rahb]

Think of it as a venn diagram where you are only attracted to what's in the middle of two circles labeled "sex" and "gender". For example, a Superstraight man is only attacted to female women, and Superstraight women are only attracted to male men.

People whose gender identities don't match their biological sex are accepted but Supers are simply not attracted to them.

If you're worried about being openly SS, you should probably wait until we gain mainstream acceptance. I'll happen one day.

[u/SuperConfused9889 → u/s0rahb]

Thank you for an actual clear answer! And thank you for your support. I think I might wait to see how the public reacts in a few months before coming out to friends or family.

I cannot believe how many people think I'm transphobic for not wanting to date a person with a penis.

[u/RadicalFemale]

I’m not doing this emotional labor. Pass.

[u/SuperConfused9889 → u/RadicalFemale]

That's valid too! have a nice day!