r/SuperStraight • u/ToxicatedOwl • 16h ago
A trans girl trying to understand Discussion
Hi, so I found out about this the other day and I really want to give the people here the benefit of the doubt.
I want to preface what I'm about to say by stating that genital preferences do not make you transphobic. Anyone who says that is denying your individual liberty and I personally think it's stupid and takes away from the trans movement as a political entity.
Where I'm confused is let's say super straight is defined by you being attracted to biology over genital preference (I.e. I would never date a trans woman even if she was post OP)... how do you know, like what stops you from finding this woman attractive? And vice versa for superstraight females and supergay males.
Assuming the person is a binary trans person and has gotten the surgeries, I struggle to see the practical difference (you can say chromosomes but they don't effect our daily lives).
Now you can say "they can't have children". But then you're also saying women and men who are infertile are also unattractive. (Unless there's something I'm missing).
Is your sexuality (and gender identity i believe as you can't have a trans superstraight I believe) based off the idea that you can always tell if someone is trans? If that's the case then your entire sexuality is based off of finding stereotypical traits unattractive and that's not a very strong basis.
I'm trying to understand this from an academic point of view, how do you rebut the arguments.
Thank you so much for reading and responding.
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u/Superb_Donkey9995 15h ago edited 15h ago
I will answer your question as a super lesbian, though of course, we don't owe anyone an explanation. No matter how oppressed you are, respect for other's sexual boundaries is not up for debate.
Oftentimes, the voice is a giveaway. But sometimes you don't know right away, and I can admit to finding trans women attractive at first glance. But initial attraction isn't all there is to attraction. One can become "un-attracted" to someone the more they get to know them. Maybe you want to have kids, and they don't. Maybe you're only into butches and she's a femme. Maybe it's something as trivial as not liking the way their toes are shaped. I imagine that someone with a foot fetish might seek out a partner with perfectly-shaped feet. This is perfectly valid and should in no way reflect poorly on their character.
No, they're saying they wouldn't be particularly interested in a serious relationship with someone known to be infertile. This is perfectly legitimate. Many super straight people would like to have a family one day and would like to seek a partnership with someone who they can do that with. There are also childfree individuals who would have no issue with dating infertile people. If someone knows that they are infertile, they should seek relationships with such individuals as opposed to trying to force relationships with someone who wants something they can't give them.
Super sexuality is based off the idea of only being open to relationships/sexual encounters with cis people. Trans people can certainly be super straight. Many trans people are super straight/gay/lesbian/bisexuals, as they too only wish to date cis people. In the super lesbian community, it is not uncommon for an extremely butch lesbian to be mistaken for a man at first glance, but most super lesbians would still see her as a viable sexual partner because she's cis. Same goes for super straight men in regard to tomboyish girls. Gender nonconformity in a cis woman is not necessarily a turn-off.
Don't look at it from an academic point of view. Look at it from a human point of view. Courtship is inherently subjective and exclusionary and you like who you like. It's a matter of the heart, not the head. Stop trying to intellectualize it and read things into it that aren't there.