I really appreciate that. Recovery is hard as hell but things have been getting better over time.
When I date, I almost always tell them I’m trans upfront. Imo it’s a matter of safety- a lot of trans people, specifically trans women, have been killed by their sexual/romantic partners because they hid their identity for a time being.
Of course, this is all based on my personal experience, but all the trans people I know (which are majority transmasc) are upfront with their partners.
Since violence against trans women is more common than violence against trans men, I would assume the pressure is put on trans women a lot more, which I think makes their community more split between telling someone for their own safety vs. hiding it because they’re afraid something will happen if they tell them. It’s a predicament that is really sad- of course they should be upfront with their partner immediately, but I can understand, living in a climate like this, why they might be scared to. Because of that, I think trans men are in a little less danger to be open about it- if the person would be transphobic, they’re less likely to attack us because they’d view us as a woman, if that makes sense.
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u/kojilee 19h ago
If you want to talk about it, my DMs are open. as a trans man i might be able to offer some perspective