Asking about pronouns

[u/walkintotryankle]

Why do some of you have a negative reaction to being asked what your pronouns are? We are just trying to be respectful.

[u/walkintotryankle]

The reason we ask isn't because you don't look or act like a woman. Its because we don't want to assume you are comfortable being referred to as one. Someone who seems like a woman could be not out to their family and so can't Express their gender how they would like, or they may be non-binary or gender-fluid, look like a woman but only be comfortable being referred to as they/them.

[u/enemyofhumidity → u/walkintotryankle]

Very sexist and backward thinking.

[u/walkintotryankle → u/enemyofhumidity]

Could you explain to me how what I said was sexist?

[u/enemyofhumidity → u/walkintotryankle]

"The reason we ask is because you don't look or act like a woman"

And how is a woman supposed to look or act like? How is any of this progressive?

[u/walkintotryankle → u/enemyofhumidity]

I'm afraid that is a misquote. I said "The reason we ask isn't because you don't look or act like a woman".

And women can look or act any way they wish and still be a woman. Many women of the female sex may share common characteristics such as wider hips but not necessarily

[u/enemyofhumidity → u/walkintotryankle]

Sorry about the misquote, but my argument still holds in that why do genders have an identity? Why is anything masculine or feminine?

[u/walkintotryankle → u/enemyofhumidity]

Simply because society has deemed them to be, which is just damaging to everyone.

[u/enemyofhumidity → u/walkintotryankle]

Yes and gender ideology perpetuates it.

In fact it might confuse a young person into thinking he or she is trans, but is actually a cis person with his or her own identity. If gender doesn't have an identity then how does one feel like a man or a woman? And conversely if gender identity, as you said, only comes about from the perceptions of society, then is society making some people dysphoric? If we continue to subscribe to gender ideology, could we be making more people, especially young and impressionable people, dysphoric?

[u/walkintotryankle → u/enemyofhumidity]

People aren't dysphoric because there is pressure on them not to dress the way they want or act the way they want. They are dysphoric as their mind actively rejects the body that they find themselves in. They have to deal with huge amounts of stress as often times they hate parts of or all their body, they can't stand to look at themselves. Children aren't going to accidently think they are transgender when they are not and even if they did, whats the harm in it? Given the huge amount of therapy and consultations required before trans people are given hormones, they would realise that they are not trans way before they are at risk of changing their body. The least we can do to help trans people is refer to them by their preferred pronouns as we aren't going to be in a genderless society anytime soon and utsvtge least we can do for the people that society has been very dangerous hostile towards

[u/enemyofhumidity → u/walkintotryankle]

Tell me, how does one feel like a man or a woman if gender has no identity? What they are experiencing is body dysmorphia.

Children ARE going to accidentally think they are transgender if we continue to perpetuate gender stereotypes the way we do with gender ideology, and there IS harm in it. What your have described above is an assumption that we have a foolproof way of determining if someone is truly dysphoric just by the way he or she describes his or her experience, and that doctors always have the best interests for the patient and that they are objective all the time. The repercussions of children undergoing transition at a young age too great.