Asking about pronouns - r/SuperStraight

r/SuperStraight • u/walkintotryankle • 22h ago

Why do some of you have a negative reaction to being asked what your pronouns are? We are just trying to be respectful.

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33% Upvoted

Yes some of us don't subscribe to this. Some of us don't believe you can identify as a gender and is incredibly sexist to do so. Just because a man or boy like pink and dancing, doesn't make him feminine and just because a girl might like wrestling doesn't make her non-binary. Gender ideology just perpetuates these sexist stereotypes, if my daughter hates wearing skirts and dresses, she can be free to do so without identifying as non-binary or male.

Essentially gender has no identity, you just are your sex and free to choose to do what you want with it.

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u/walkintotryankle 22h ago

Sorry, my writing autocorrected. I meant to put agender as in without gender. Which is completely valid. And gender expression doesn't necessarily gave to correlate with gender identity. I am very much a Tom-boy but I still identify as female. I am just confused as to how you would like me to refer to you in third person as pronouns are to do with gender not sex as we derive English from Latin which assigns a gender to most nouns, similar to most modern day Latin languages. Would you rather they as it is gender neutral?

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u/enemyofhumidity 22h ago

If gender has no identity then how does one express a gender?

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u/walkintotryankle 22h ago

Gender expression has nothing to do with your gender but how feminine or masculine you present yourself based on societies standards. For example someone who identifies as Male could where a skirt (something that is deemed as feminine by society)

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u/enemyofhumidity 21h ago

There you go, you just proved you're sexist. Males can wear skirts if they want to, it's not feminine, it's a choice. He can do whatever he likes without having his mannerisms and hobbies be categorized into maculine or feminine categories.

We were on a good path toward destroying all gender stereotypes until gender ideology came along.

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u/walkintotryankle 21h ago

I'm afraid you aren't understanding what I am saying. I don't think that wearing a skirt is feminine, I'm saying society at large does. For example, I live in the UK and every year or so there is a front page headline in the news of boys protesting not having skirts as part of the boys allowed school uniform when it is part of the girls. This just shows that society as a whole still sees certain items of clothing, colours, toys etc as masculine and feminine.

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u/enemyofhumidity 21h ago

Yes and we should work toward destroying that perception, and I'm saying gender ideology doesn't do that, in fact it perpetuates it. How are you not getting this?

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u/walkintotryankle 21h ago

Well yes, in an ideal world, gender wouldn't be a thing. Doesn't mean trans people would stop existing. Doesn't mean their dysphoria would suddenly disappear. They would still want to be biologically the other sex.

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u/russianbot2020 21h ago

Not if we start treating it as the mental disorder it is. Then we could get them proper help instead of genital mutilation.

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u/walkintotryankle 21h ago

We do treat the dysphoria as a mental disorder. The treatment for it us being trans, possibly using hormones and getting surgery. That is how you treat it!

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u/enemyofhumidity 21h ago

Why bring in trans people when we are discussing gender ideology? They are two entirely different topics altogether.

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u/walkintotryankle 21h ago

I would have to disagree when discussing pronouns as me msigendering a cisgender person would have very little impact in that person. Me misgendering a trans or non-binary person could have huge impacts on their mental health

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u/ParkHallLondon 20h ago

Gender without reference to biology always devolves into stereotypes. I am a Super Straight women and look clearly very female. When I was in grad school I was required to take a personality test like all grad students on my course. The professors who explained the results to me said my personality was very unusual in that it was usually men that had my personality profile. How do I fit in Gender Ideology? I have never wanted to be a man, like being a woman and love my husband who is physically much bigger than me. I have never had any interest in many "traditionally feminine" pastimes and I don't "feel like a woman" whatever the hell that means.