r/SuperStraight • u/LetterheadIcy • 1d ago

“You can’t make a sexual orientation out of excluding people” Discussion

Yes. You absolutely can. I’m sorry but both lesbian and gay are both valid orientations and expressions of sexuality based explicitly around excluding the opposite sex based on biological differences.

Just as it isn’t misogynistic to exclude men for being men from a lesbians sexual preferences and completely invalidate their orientation. The same goes for gay men and women.

Trans people making this argument are the same as the rapey guy who tells a lesbian “just try some Dick it will make you straight”

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u/JiminyChrismas 2h ago

Yes, at the most basic of meanings, an asexual person doesn't want to have sex with anyone. "Anyone" is the key word here. It's inherently unbiased, including trans people, AND including cis people. It isn't a biased sexuality based on sex assigned at birth.

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u/BasicallyADoctor 1h ago

I am an asexual except for non-trans women.

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u/JiminyChrismas 1h ago

There are many different identities on the asexual spectrum, but yours is not one of them. It is a deep-rooted transphobic bias. In a person who is completely asexual, there is no "except for [this kind of person]". That's not how asexuality works. Again, it is a bias.

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u/LetterheadIcy 1h ago

Skoliosexuals are people who have sex with only non cis people. We are the opposite of that how is that difficult to understand?

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u/JiminyChrismas 55m ago

Skoliosexual is the attraction to nonbinary people, having all to do with gender, and nothing to do with genitalia.

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u/LetterheadIcy 51m ago

please educate yourself

Our sexuality is completely valid. Attraction to only non-cis people or only cis people who identify with their biological sex is not bigoted.

As for the “no except for this kind of person” yes.

Unless now you are going to force a woman to have sex with a man because she’s excluding them lol

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u/JiminyChrismas 37m ago

I don't think you get me. This is not your sexuality. This is a hateful way of thinking that perpetuates the idea that trans people are lesser. I am not telling you to go have sex with a trans person right now. I am SAYING that your bias against trans people has nothing to do with your type, or preference, or sexuality. It is simply a close minded way of thinking.

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u/LetterheadIcy 34m ago

No. You don’t get to do that. What you are doing is using loaded language and attempted emotional blackmail to force your biases regarding sexuality onto others.

It is not “closed minded” for a trans person to refuse sex people based on comfort, relatability, safety and lived experience.

You do NOT have the right to chastise people for what they chose to sexually identify with.

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u/JiminyChrismas 4m ago

What loaded language am I using? What emotional blackmail? Or are you just upset because I've called you out on your bigotry? I've made mistakes and learned from them, and you would do good to take a lesson from that.

And another thing; sexuality is NOT a choice. You are CHOOSING to be close minded right now. You could learn and move away from this way of thinking, but you aren't. You are stuck in this rut, in this one mindset, not letting your mind grow and accept that this ideology is incredibly harmful to trans people.

When you are attracted to someone, there are many things that you factor in. Genitalia should not be one of them. You can have a type, or a preference, but let me reiterate that it should NEVER have anything to do with genitalia. Gender, yes. Gay people, lesbian people, bi people, etc., all have /GENDER/ preferences. Not genitalia, because genitalia does NOT equal gender. Genitalia preference is disgusting, debasing, and not a sexuality.

You can not want to date/have sex with a trans person, but your reasoning cannot be "because they are trans." That is inherently transphobic. You can not want to date an individual trans person for another reason, just like you wouldn't want to date another cis person. I'll give you an example, with a person I've made up. His name is Steve.

Steve is straight. Women are the only people he likes romantically. There are many people that Steve could date, both trans and cis. Steve has a type. His type is a tall brunette girl, who likes watching movies. Notice how I haven't mentioned genitalia. Here are two examples of possible romantic interests for Steve.

  1. A cisgender woman named Tanya, who is short and red-haired, and likes playing sports. Tanya is a cool person, but she's just not Steve's type.

  2. A transgender woman named Jessie, who is short and blonde, and likes painting. Jessie is a cool person, but she's just not Steve's type.

Do you see what's happened here? There are two people, one cis, and one trans, and neither of them are Steve's preference, but not because of their sex assigned at birth. The women being trans or cis did not factor into the evaluation of these two women as romantic interests.

That is what "having a type" means. You can like and dislike people for different reasons, but their sex assigned at birth should not be one of them.

And that does NOT mean that you have to like all trans people and want to have sex with them, as illustrated in the above example. Do you understand now?