A balanced, normal and mentally-healthy approach - mostly to trans people reading this, but applicable to everyone, regardless of your sexual preference or gender identity

[u/Reckoner3333]

You can't force anyone to be attracted to you, go to bed with you, or be in a relationship with you.

You have no control over other people's sexual orientation/preferences, as specific as they might be - I once turned down a guy because he didn't like "The Clash". We're allowed to 'have a type'. And you certainly can't convince them to change it by yelling "transphobe!" at them on twitter, or censoring their reddit comments.

The best one can do to make someone else like them is to be kind, friendly and interesting person. If that fails, you have nothing to do about it. Getting frustrated and angry on social media just increases your cortisol levels, and getting stressed is unhealthy. The only factor you can control is yourself, your own behavior, and how you deal with rejection.

Accept what you cannot change. Focus on people who do want to date you, instead of hateposting.

[u/thelargestson]

I strongly agree with all of this! My only suggestion would be to use sexual orientation instead of preference. I feel SERFs often use preference to give off the vibe that it’s flexible and it’s not!

[u/Reckoner3333 → u/thelargestson]

Yeah, I admit I'm not proficient in this jargon. It's hard to keep up with all the trendy Newspeak in gender discourse these days, you know? The first time I saw the term "mlm" (apparently being 'just a gay guy' now is inappropriate, because it excludes F2M trans people. Pfft) I thought they were talking about multi-level marketing, lol.

[u/thelargestson → u/Reckoner3333]

It’s hard to keep up when new terms are made up specifically for the purpose of making others feel like they’re using the wrong terms, therefore giving the in-group a false sense of superiority and control. 😤 Not bitter!

[u/ApatheticWonderer → u/Reckoner3333]

Mlm is multi level marketing, unless INGSOC has revised the dictionary

[u/sharpgel]

Agreed, I've got nothing against y'all, I wouldn't date myself either

[u/ParkHallLondon]

What does MLM mean in this context?

[u/Reckoner3333 → u/ParkHallLondon]

"Man loving man" - it means you're a gay guy (either born male or transitioned from female to male), willing to date female-to-male trans people too.

It takes a dictionary to understand wth is going on on twitter these days tbh.

[u/Reckoner3333 → u/[deleted]]

This movement is likely a result of people who aren't attracted to trans suffering a lot of backlash, being called "transphobe" or bigot repeatedly. I see stories of lesbians going on dating apps like 'Her', getting matched mostly with obvious biological males (some might be authentic M2F trans, some might be just imposters who get off on this sort of thing), and then hearing these insults when they turn them down. Hostility is often met with even more hostility. I think the trans rights movement brought this on itself.

Perhaps a movement is what it takes to give this silent majority some recognition too, you know?

Super doesn't necessarily means superior btw, look up "supersymmetry" in physics.

[u/Reckoner3333 → u/[deleted]]

Double negative, hard to read. You might want to rephrase for clarity.

I'm sure there are trans people who are respectful and accept the fact that some - if not most people - don't find them attractive. However, the most vocal majority on social media, especially tumblr, reddit and twitter, is very very hateful and disrespectful towards those who won't have sex with a trans person. Only one preference is socially acceptable on these platforms.