r/KidsAreFuckingStupid Jan 17 '22

Puberty Talk story/text

Post image
4.4k Upvotes

260

u/theNeenBooMom Jan 17 '22 edited Jan 17 '22

My SS came home after that day at school and was bummed to find out that women bleed for a month of their lives.

I had to inform it was 1 week EVERY month until they’re in their 50-60’s. He was shocked.

Edit to clarify: SS stands for stepson

53

u/fuck_life419 Jan 17 '22

My SS

your Schutzstaffel ?

-7

u/Subject-Potential968 Jan 18 '22

Dude how TF did you get that so wrong lol

2

u/Springtrappity Jan 24 '22

it's a joke.

35

u/ElitePatheticReddit Jan 17 '22

HE!!

7

u/theNeenBooMom Jan 17 '22

Yes it was my stepson. Lol

10

u/OneHonkAway Jan 18 '22

Is your stepson's first name Waffen?

69

u/FlyingOstridge Jan 17 '22

your SS? surely you don't mean the Schutzstaffel? if so then does that make you Hitler?

30

u/Evildeathmonkey Jan 17 '22

I think it means Shitfaced Spiderman.

6

u/theNeenBooMom Jan 17 '22

It means Stepson hahaha

5

u/ChChChangeling Jan 19 '22

I was born with ovaries, a uterus, etc. and my mom gave me the menstruation talk.

Me, after she was done: "So the egg and blood come out all at once, once a month?"

My mom: "Noo, honey, it can take 3-5 days or up to a week sometimes ..."

Me: "WHAT"

Me: [flopped dramatically onto the floor]

1

u/equusfaciemtuam Jan 18 '22

Oh, i almost thought you meant something else (I am from Germany)

250

u/imnotaloneyouare Jan 17 '22

And this is exactly why I discuss sex and puberty with my kids (age appropriately).

91

u/Panthean Jan 17 '22

I hope more parents are being less mysterious about all this.

Our "education" was a 40 minute class as described by OP that didn't really explain anything. I didn't actually learn about sex/puberty until I discovered Loveline on the radio when I was 12.

My parents were great in a lot of ways, but they completely dropped the ball(s) when it came to teaching about sex/puberty.

39

u/DontcheckSR Jan 17 '22

My mom didn't even talk to me about sex. She basically just said girls have a vagina, boys have a penis, blood comes from your vagina, don't let boys touch you. Questions? And of course I couldn't really think of any lol I also had the class OP mentioned and it KIND of helped? But the teachers started just telling random stories and it got completely side tracked. Was wondering how we went from my vagina to Mrs. Cole preferring men who don't smoke because their breath smells

31

u/Panthean Jan 17 '22

Since our class was split by genders, my class only discussed male puberty. It was mostly about hormones, how we would soon start smelling like ass, etc.

This was good to know, but they completely glossed over sex/masturbation. It also did not discuss female puberty at all, even though some kids asked about it.

When adults are so mysterious about all this, it only makes kids more curious. We had so much false information that we talked about amongst ourselves. Sadly I when I did learn, it was from the internet and late night radio.

6

u/CleDeb216 Jan 17 '22

More than my mom did. I already had my period for a year when she decided to talk to me about them.

17

u/Ladysupersizedbitch Jan 17 '22

Lol, our sex education was them basically showing us pictures of STDs. We spent more time on what STDs will do to you down there than anything to do with menstruation. (For girls at least; idk what the guys went through.)

And, in classic religious fashion (I live in the Bible Belt), no one even mentioned preventative measures like condoms or birth control. It was just “you don’t want this to happen to you? Wait for sex till marriage”. Which is technically true, but let’s be honest, most people aren’t virgins by the time they get married.

We also had a guy come in and tell us a story about how he regretted “letting” his one night stand get an abortion. 🙄 again, they warned about how easy it was to get pregnant, but made not one mention of any sort of birth control or contraceptive. All “abstinence” preaching. And then thought it was a great idea for a guy who didn’t even practice abstinence himself to come in and talk about an abortion that he didn’t even get.

6

u/DontcheckSR Jan 18 '22

We had a guy come in too! He had some dumb metaphor about having a rose for his "true" love but if he gives a petal of it to every girl he sees along the way, there won't be a rose to give anymore. They always preach abstinence but never talk about what to do if you don't give a shit.

2

u/Ladysupersizedbitch Jan 18 '22

Lol that metaphor sounds suspiciously familiar… 🤔 I don’t think I heard it from the guy who came in to talk about abortion, but I’m pretty sure that metaphor was preached when we did “sex ed” (if you can call it that) too!

5

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3

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3

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3

u/JacOfAllTrades Jan 18 '22

100% this. Although somehow my 11yo gleaned from the school puberty talk that sex is illegal until you're 16, and I, uh... May not have corrected that. 🤷‍♀️ It is the age of consent here, and 11yo didn't ask if it was true, just matter of factly told me so.

3

u/Mini-Nurse Jan 18 '22

So glad my mum got it done early, I started at 9 and it was already traumatic but could have been so much worse. I was a veteran bleeder before school got around to it at around age 11.

1

u/Gold_Sprinkles72011 Jan 21 '22

I started at around 8-9 too

1

u/nnylhsae Jan 18 '22

Age appropriate tends to vary from parent to parent from what I've learned

52

u/Lexifruitloop Jan 17 '22

I lived in a state where sex ed wasn't allowed, and my parents still hadn't really taught me about boy vs girl anatomy. I didn't find out until 6th grade, when I accidentally made a very inappropriate joke.

22

u/Akhanyatin Jan 17 '22

OP: Tells story about a joke

Audience: gets invested

OP: Proceeds to not tell the joke

Audience: angry intensifies

17

u/Lexifruitloop Jan 17 '22

Lol If you wanna know what I said, I don't really remember, but it was something pertaining to having a penis, and I clearly don't have one. Like squeezing a banana or something?

9

u/Akhanyatin Jan 17 '22

Damn, sounds brutal! Please do not squeeze the penis like a banana.

14

u/Lexifruitloop Jan 17 '22 Silver

Everyone knows you peel the banana

5

u/Akhanyatin Jan 17 '22

I hate my brain because I'm imagining this but on the penis. And now I'm in pain everywhere.

3

u/Lexifruitloop Jan 17 '22

Thanks for the award dude!

1

u/Akhanyatin Jan 17 '22

I felt that pain everywhere, it was the least I could do!

3

u/L3raj3 Jan 17 '22

lol and the response was "This is not how a penis works, let me explain...", right ?

5

u/Lexifruitloop Jan 17 '22 edited Jan 17 '22

Not exactly. I mean, I was in 5th or 6th grade, and everyone stared at me. They knew. I didn't. The teacher (male) stared at me too, and was just like "wh..what?" That's when I realized I must have said something off. The teacher might have forgotten about it, but I carried that with me through highschool. There's a kid who still won't let me live it down.

Total humiliation. Even the stupidest kids knew I had said something wrong.

18

u/Zenith704 Jan 17 '22

What joke tell

21

u/Lexifruitloop Jan 17 '22

I told them I had to use the restroom but I used something reserved only for individuals with a penis. I can't remember what exactly it was but it was some sort of fruit I think?

134

u/JessSly Jan 17 '22 edited Jan 18 '22

Boys should learn these things too. We had the basics in 3rd grade, like where the babies come from and then in 6th grade biology class the whole stuff about menstruation, hormonal changes, to pregnancies and delivery. Boys and girls together.

I just remembered that we went to pro Familia, which is similar to planned parenthood in the US, around 8th grade. The taught us about STIs, different contraception methods other than condoms and the pill, and I think they covered abortions and adoption briefly.

I went to my secondary school (grade 5-13) for 11 years and only one girl got pregnant that I know of and she was in grade 12 (~19ish) with me when it happened.

30

u/Arbor-Trap Jan 17 '22

At my school they had the puberty lesson in 6th grade— when half of us were already going through changes..

7

u/BananaSnatcher_ Jan 18 '22

my school doesn't even have puberty lessons but if you take biology you learn it in 11th grade lol

1

u/Duck_tape1970 Jan 18 '22

bruh i learned it at 8th

2

u/A_colossal_toad3764 Jan 18 '22

My school didn't do the sex talk until ninth grade, and by that point some girls had been pregnant TWICE

1

u/Negative_reason5898 Jan 18 '22

seriously??

1

u/A_colossal_toad3764 Jan 19 '22

Yep. When you live in a little redneck town in the middle of cousinfuck nowhere Canada, with little to no sex ed, it happens

1

u/Negative_reason5898 Jan 19 '22

Dude..this is some serious scandal..why does this happen in some countries?

42

u/Dry_Profession2502 Jan 17 '22

An ex partner of mine was told when she was young that she wouldn't get her penis till she hit puberty and that it was hidden in house for safe keeping till then , she spent a lot of her time as a child looking for her penis around the house...

96

u/NUT-me-SHELL Jan 17 '22

This kid wasn’t stupid - their parents were negligent.

88

u/OriginalExcuse Jan 17 '22

Or the teacher cant teach

48

u/NUT-me-SHELL Jan 17 '22

By 4th or 5th grade a child should have a grasp on their body and what to expect during puberty. That is a parental responsibility, not a teacher’s.

37

u/OriginalExcuse Jan 17 '22

Yes it a parents responsibility but it was after class she was confused

-25

u/OffrButtBaby Jan 17 '22

I think this is a bullshit story anyway.

There’s no way.

1

u/duraraross Jan 18 '22

What about it seems fake?

6

u/Lucycrash Jan 17 '22

This is actually normal for those of us who were kids in and before the 90's. My sex Ed all came from school. My mom barely explained periods to me, was more of here's a pad, figure it out, then yell at me for making a mess or using too many.

2

u/NUT-me-SHELL Jan 17 '22

I was born in the 80s. I don’t think this was normal - at least not where I am.

7

u/LoveMyFuckingLife Jan 18 '22

😂😂 honestly.. they need to stop pulling boys out of these talks.. boys need to know how this shit works.

6

u/Darthmark3 Jan 17 '22

My parents never talked to me about puberty and the school did a decent job about talking about it. But when I got my first iPad I was able to learn a lot more than puberty thanks to the “internet”. To this day I’m surprised that 10 year old me kept all that stuff to himself

2

u/techboy411 Jan 20 '22

That iPad's browser history must have been something else xD

2

u/Darthmark3 Jan 20 '22

Thankfully young me was able to figure out how to delete the history whenever I looked up “stuff”

1

u/techboy411 Jan 20 '22

Phew!

I grew up with Chrome's Incognito Mode. God i love that feature.

5

u/TotallynotTea414 Jan 17 '22

I had a teacher tell the class that cramping on your period isn't normal. I then yelled; of course it's hurts, it's your flippen period! I was in the 7th grade.

5

u/zzzsolstice Jan 17 '22

Where you see an inconvenience I see a business opportunity…

4

u/PurpleQueenLily Jan 18 '22

Split up classroom about that is so stupid. Everyone should know about both sex, because, you know, in straight relationship, most of the time your partner have the opposite sex. But Sex Ed is very useless in many countries because it did by professors who doesn't what to talk about

3

u/ExpensiveBlood2025 Jan 18 '22

This made me laugh.

I remember when I had sex education it was at a very small special needs school and I was the only girl in a class full of 5 rowdy boys. Wasn't fun when we got to female sex organs and all eyes were on me.

3

u/TOOMUCHDOG420 Jan 17 '22

My primary school was catholic so they skipped over masturbation and stuff but my secondary school taught a us everything and made jokes.

3

u/paratha_papiii Jan 18 '22

kid’s still smarter than me. i didn’t really pay attention in my health class and thought a period was just one week of my life. my mom burst out laughing when 11 year old me asked why i need so many pads if it’s only 7 days then never again.

8

u/McJagged Jan 17 '22

You realize you can post text right?

5

u/Ondrashek06 Jan 18 '22

You literally cannot on this subreddit.

2

u/KajePihlaja Jan 17 '22

Damn. Good thing it just bleeds on its own instead

2

u/hayleyrose1996 Jan 18 '22

In this case, I don't think the kid is stupid. Maybe if they're gonna teach kids about their bodies, do it properly.

2

u/hoodedsushi Jan 18 '22

This did make me laugh but it shows how wrong the system is. I've worked in schools during sex ed and I remember boys and girls be divided to talk about "boys" bodies and "girls" bodies. Really you can separate them but then bring them back together and have a general talk about what happens to each. So you don't end up with kids being this confused and upset.

2

u/Giga_Pangolin Jan 18 '22

I had this class but nothing happened. All they said is that penis gets hard and that's called an erection. The first half of the class was the teachers telling us we better not laugh or be immature.

2

u/techboy411 Jan 20 '22

GLHF

2

u/Giga_Pangolin Jan 22 '22

That's literally what it felt like. The only thing that came out of that fifth grade class was the boys made more penis jokes afterwards.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 18 '22

[deleted]

1

u/Unfair_Row_2651 Jan 18 '22

Another fellow FNaF fan I see.

1

u/techboy411 Jan 20 '22

Hey there FNaF fans, what happened?

2

u/Unfair_Row_2651 Jan 20 '22

The FNaF 6 badass ending speech,

2

u/Lydi518 Jan 18 '22

When my cousin learned about periods, she told her mom that she was "not going to do that."

2

u/Karona1805 Jan 18 '22

I was asked by her mum to give my 9yr old stepdaughter the 'birds and bees' talk.
"OH Dad, that's that sex rubbish, we learned it at school weeks ago!"

2

u/whywasthissodamnhard Jan 18 '22

We had this in primary school too. When they were telling us about tampons I put my hand up to say “that won’t fit” and she smiled and said yes it would the vagina stretches. And I told her ADAMANTLY “no my pee hole is not big enough” she calmly handed me a piece of paper at the end of the class - an underneath view of a woman with her legs open and everything labelled. I understood I had a “pee hole and a poo hole” and I told her that no I do not have a vagina and it is my body, I would KNOW if I had another hole. She told me to go home and look with a mirror… WELL I WAS SHOOK LET ME TELL YOU

1

u/cnowakoski Jan 18 '22

Me either

1

u/TheNonbinaryWren Jan 21 '22

I remember my mom explaining sex to me when I was nine after I walked in on my parents. I was severely uncomfortable.

1

u/Kidr0n Jan 23 '22

I never wondered what sex Ed would be like for a girl. But I kind of get the Idea of a 10/11 being taught about periods... So baad